Monday 30 September 2013

What REALLY makes a woman want to sleep with a man?

What REALLY makes a woman want to sleep with a man?



What makes a woman want to sleep with a man? Is it true that a chap can laugh a woman into bed? Does he need to be tall, dark and handsome to stand any chance at all?
Today, in the second extract from the new book Why Women Have Sex, by psychologists Cindy Meston and David Buss, we reveal the features that make a man appeal to a woman, and why, are far more fascinating and complex than you could imagine...
Rules of attraction: A fascinating guide to the complex features that will make a man appeal to a woman
Rules of attraction: A fascinating guide to the complex features that will make a man appeal to a woman
Checklist: Can a man really laugh a woman into bed?
Checklist: Can a man really laugh a woman into bed?

SIZE MATTERS
What sort of body does a woman find desirable? Perhaps the most obvious physical characteristic she looks for in a man is height.
Studies consistently find that women consider tall men to be attractive. In analyses of personal ads, 80 per cent of women state they want to meet a man who is 6ft or taller.
Men who indicate in their personal ads that they are tall have also been shown to receive far more responses from women.
Other studies show women prefer tall men as husbands and put an even greater emphasis on height in shorter-term sex partners. Women even place importance on height when selecting sperm donors. 
Two studies also found that taller-than-average men tend to have a greater number of live-in girlfriends and more children, confirming their popularity for romance and reproduction.
And there does seem to be an underlying logic in women's preference for tall men. In Western cultures, tall men tend to have higher socio-economic status than short men.
Each added inch of height has been shown to add several thousand pounds to a man's annual salary. 
It is estimated that, on average, 6ft men earn more than £100,000 across a 30-year career than 5ft 5in men. 
They also tend to be healthier than shorter men - and if they're policemen, they get assaulted less than their shorter colleagues, which suggests height commands more respect from other men. What more could a girl want?

THE SCENT OF SEX
According to new scientific research, a woman will literally sniff out a man's genetic make-up before she decides if he's right for her.
A woman's sense of smell reaches a peak around the time of her ovulation, the 24-hour window -during the monthly menstrual cycle in which she can become pregnant.
The genes responsible for fighting off disease-causing bacteria and viruses are found in a group of genes called the major histocompatibility complex, or MHC. 
Different people have various versions of these genes  -  and it turns out that women can benefit in two ways from mating with men whose MHC genes are dissimilar to their own.
Such a mate is likely to have more dissimilar genes in general, so finding someone dissimilar attractive might help to prevent many of the birth defects associated with reproducing with close genetic relatives. 
Sexy voice: Voice pitch is the most striking feature of human speech
Sexy tone: Voice pitch is the most striking feature of human speech n]
A second benefit is any children of such a union will have a more robust immune system.
The interesting thing is that women seem to be able to sniff out men with dissimilar MHC.
In a revealing study, Brazilian researchers asked 29 men to wear cotton skin patches for five days to absorb their sweat  -  and thus their body odours. 
A sample of 29 women then smelled each cotton patch and evaluated the odour on a scale from attractive to unattractive.
Scientists identified the specific MHC complex of each man and woman through blood tests. Women found the aromas of men who had a complex dissimilar to their own to be the most desirable.
The odours of men who had a complex similar to their own made them recoil in disgust.
This highly developed sense of smell can have a profound effect on women's sexuality.
Evolutionary psychologist Christine Garver-Apgar studied MHC similarity in 48 couples.
They found that as the degree of similarity between each woman and man increased, the woman's sexual responsiveness to her partner decreased.
Women whose partners had similar genes reported wanting to have sex less often. They had less motivation to please their partner sexually compared to the women going out with men with dissimilar genes.
Women with MHC-similar partners also reported more frequent sexual fantasies about other men, particularly at the most fertile phase of their ovulation cycle.
And their sexual fantasies about other men did not just remain in their heads. They also reported higher rates of sexual infidelity.

FIT FOR SEX
Height is not the only aspect of men's bodies that excites women.
Studies of mate preferences reveal that women desire strong, muscular, athletic men for long-term partnerships as well as for sexual liaisons.
Most women also show a distinct preference for a V-shaped torso - broad shoulders relative to hips. They are also attracted to a lean stomach combined with a muscular (but not muscle-bound) upper torso.
In fact, both sexes judge men with a high shoulder-to-hip ratio to be more physically and socially dominant.
This may give a clue to its appeal, since women are not attracted to men who appear as though they could be easily dominated by other men.
Men with a high shoulder-to-hip ratio begin having sexual intercourse at an early age - 16 or younger. 
Sexual attraction: A woman will literally sniff out a man's genetic make-up before she decides if he's right for her
Sexual attraction: A woman will literally sniff out a man's genetic make-up before she decides if he's right for her
They report having more sex partners than their slim-shouldered peers. But be warned: they have more affairs while in a relationship. 
And they report more instances of being chosen by women who are already in relationships for affairs on the side. 
Scientific research, though, has discovered that men overestimate the degree of muscularity that women find attractive, assuming they need to pump iron and sport a honed six-pack to be attractive.
Images of muscle-bound men have almost certainly fostered men's misperception of what women find most sexually attractive - just as photo spreads of impossibly thin models have led women to overestimate the degree of thinness that men find most attractive.
One study compared the muscularity of men's bodies in Cosmopolitan magazine (whose readership is 89 per cent women) with Men's Health (whose readership is 85 per cent men).
The level of muscularity in Cosmopolitan was nearly identical to that which women rate as ideal in a sexual partner. Men, in contrast, mistakenly believe women desire a more muscular sex partner, which corresponds more closely with the muscularity of men in Men's Health.
After viewing repeated images of V-shaped bodies, men become more dissatisfied with their own bodies, just as women become more unhappy with their bodies after seeing images of size zero models.

THE FACE OF ATTRACTION
When it comes to choosing between a rugged, conventionally handsome man and an ordinary, less attractive partner, women have a difficult choice to make.
In a series of scientific studies, women found square-jawed, masculine faces to be the sexiest and the most attractive for a casual sexual encounter.
But they judged somewhat less masculine faces to be more attractive for a long-term relationship.
Women's sexual desires for testosterone-fuelled facial cues of masculinity were especially strong during the fertile window of their cycle.
The most plausible interpretation of these results is that women are attracted to men who are likely to be 'good dads' when choosing long-term mates, but are attracted to the signals of robust health that more masculine faces provide when they are most likely to become impregnated.
Why do more masculine faces signify health? High testosterone production actually compromises the body's immune functioning, leaving men less able to fight off diseases and parasites in adolescence.
Only men who are above average in healthiness during adolescence can 'afford' to produce the high levels of testosterone that masculinise the face.
Less healthy adolescents can't afford to compromise their already precarious immune systems, and so produce lower levels of testosterone at precisely the time when facial bones take their adult form.
So, a masculine-looking face signals a man's health, his ability to succeed in competing with other men and his ability to protect.
This interpretation, however, raises a puzzle: Why wouldn't women be attracted to highly masculine males for all mating relationships, from dangerous liaisons through to life-long love?
The answer lies in the fact that the more masculine men, with more testosterone, tend to be less sexually faithful.
They are more likely to be the risk-taking, womanising bad boys among the male population.
Consequently, most women face a trade- off: if they choose the less masculine-looking man, they are likely to get a better father and sexually loyal mate, but they lose out in the currency of genes for good health. 
If they choose the more masculine man, they can endow their children with good genes for health, but must suffer the costs of a man who channels some of his sexual energy toward other women. It's a tricky choice.

A SEXY VOICE
Voice pitch is the most striking feature of human speech and, according to research, there is a definite sound of sexiness - something about male voices that gives women a sexual buzz.
Before puberty, male and female voices are similar. At puberty, however, remarkable changes occur. Boys experience a dramatic increase in the length of their vocal cords, which become 60 per cent longer than those of girls.
Longer vocal cords and tracts produce a deeper, more resonant voice pitch.
Testosterone triggers the change in boys at puberty and high levels of testosterone predict deeper voices among adult men.
Recent investigations show that whether women are looking for a short-term or long-term relationship is critical in how they choose among men's voices. 
Evolutionary anthropologist David Puts obtained voice recordings of 30 men attempting to persuade a woman to go out on a romantic date. 

Then 142 heterosexual women listened to the recordings and rated each man's attractiveness for a short-term sexual encounter and a long-term committed relationship.
Though women said the deeper voices were more attractive in both mating contexts, they dramatically preferred the deeper voices when considering them as prospects for purely sexual, short-term encounters.
Moreover, women in the fertile phase of their ovulation cycle showed the strongest sexual attraction to men with deep voices.
One hint as to why this is so is found in studies of female frogs. They gravitate towards male bullfrogs with deep, resonant croaks, which are a reliable signal - for frogs - of a mate's size and health. 
Research on people has revealed two similar reasons that help to explain why women find some men's voices much more attractive than others. 
The first involves bilateral body symmetry (when both sides of the body are symmetrical), which is commonly accepted as a sign of good health and good genes.
Body symmetry is also more likely to produce deep voices.
So when a woman finds the resonance of a man's voice even sexier during her fertile, ovulatory phase, she is attracted to the sound of healthy genes for her possible offspring.

SOMETHING IN THE WAY HE MOVES
The way a person dances reveals a huge amount of information.It broadcasts information about age  -  notice the difference between the
What REALLY makes a woman want to dancing prowess of younger versus older dancers. It also conveys information about energy level, health and biomechanical efficiency. 
In fact, in our studies, we found that some women had sex with men simply because they'd been impressed by their dancing. Research reveals that women find certain body movements to be more attractive than others.
One study had women view digitally masked or pixellated images of men dancing. They were more attracted to men who displayed larger and more sweeping movements. They also rated these men more erotic.
Other patterns of men's movements provide women with valuable mating information. Nonreciprocal same-sex touching -  when a man touches another man's back, for example - is a well-documented signal of dominance.
Women see 'touchers' as having more status, a key component of a man's mate value. Movements that maximise space, as when a man stretches his arms or extends his legs, are another dominance signal.
Those who display open body positioning - for example, by not folding their arms across the chest  - are judged to be more potent and persuasive.

SEXY PERSONALITY
Sexual attraction isn't simply a matter of physical bodies drawn magnetically together in search of compatibility.
For some women, personality - in particular, a good sense of humour - is equally, if not more, important in generating a sexual spark.
One indication of the importance of a good sense of humour in a man is that it is one of the few personality traits that has its own abbreviation in online dating sites: GSOH.
Another is that research shows married women who think their husbands are witty are more satisfied with their marriages than women who do not.
Women rate it as a desirable trait in short-term sexual and long-term romantic relationships.
Why a sense of humour is so important in sexual attraction has been the subject of scientific debate.
One critical distinction is between humour production (making others laugh) and humour appreciation (laughing at others' jokes).
There's a sex difference - men define a woman with a good sense of humour as someone who laughs at their jokes. Men especially like women who are receptive to their humour.
Women, in contrast, are attracted to men who produce humour, and that's true for all types of relationships, from one-night stands to lifelong matings.
The most likely explanation for why women and men alike are attracted to those with a sense of humour is because laughing elicits a positive mood - it's a sign of confidence and intelligence, too.





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7 Sex Mistakes Men Make

7 Sex Mistakes Men Make

You know how most guys learn about sex? You're taught the basic facts of life, then left to puzzle out your partners' sexuality -- and your own -- by trial and error.
Experience is useful, but it isn't everything. Even guys who've had a lot of sexual experience with women make mistakes.
So you don’t have to learn the hard way, three well-known sex educators tell you how to avoid the most common sex mistakes men make with women.

Mistake 1: Assuming You Know How to Please a Woman

Some men assume that the way they've learned to please one woman works for all women. Not so.
"With each sexual partner you have, you gain a growing body of knowledge of female bodies and female pleasure," says Tristan Taormino, author of The Secrets of Great G-Spot Orgasms and Female Ejaculation. "But women's sexuality is complicated, and it's really individual."
Every woman's body responds in different ways to sensation, and every woman's anatomy is a little different. What feels amazing to one may do nothing -- or even cause discomfort -- for another. Patti Britton, PhD, MPH, a sexologist in Los Angeles, says, "That is the detective work you need to do each and every time. We really each have a sexual fingerprint."
When it comes to intercourse, one key variable is your thrusting technique: Does she like it fast or slow? Deep or shallow? Or does she like to mix it up -- slow and shallow at first, and then fast and deep?
Also, no one sex position is every woman's favorite. She may prefer a certain sex position for several reasons. Different positions allow various angles of penetration, depending not only on her anatomy, but also the size and shape of your penis. Differences between partners' body shape and height may make some positions better than others. And for some women, it's important to have face-to-face intimacy during intercourse.
"I talk to tons of women who say, ‘I know missionary gets a bad rap, but I really like it.'" Taormino says. "Others say, ‘It's got to be from behind. People are really across the board when it comes to positions."


Mistake 2: "Let's (Not) Talk About Sex"

Most couples who seek counseling with sex therapist Chris Donaghue don't talk to each other about sex. Often that's because they don't have the words. Donaghue says many of them don't know, or aren't comfortable using correct terms.
For example, a guy might say "vagina" when he means the vulva. He may talk about "doing it," though it's not always clear what "it" is: Vaginal intercourse? Oral sex? "A lot of work initially is just getting them comfortable with those words," says Donaghue, host of Bad Sex, a reality TV series on Logo.
Taormino says if it's hard for your partner to say what she wants sexually, try asking specific instead of open-ended questions. "What do you like?" is an open-ended question that often doesn't get a useful answer.

"Do one thing then do another thing -- and then say, 'Which do you like better?'" Taormino says. "It's like a multiple-choice question. They don't have to write an essay. They just have to pick A or B."
Many men also think they should keep quiet during sex. Usually that's not a good thing. "There are far too many people having sex in silence in America," Taormino says. She says couples should give each other verbal cues during sex. "In my sex-ed videos, I really like them to talk to each other and ask each other what they want." She suggests using neutral prompts like, "harder," "slower," or "right there." (Same as directions you'd give to someone scratching your back.) "Give really basic, clear information," she says. "You don't have to be a sort of master dirty talker."
But dirty talk can be fun, too, says Britton, "if everyone's on the same page about it." And if you don't like talking dirty, you can still talk sexy without being lewd. "Telling her you want her can be highly arousing and get great results," Britton says. "But say, ‘I want you,' and not, ‘I want it.' That's the secret."
Don't hold back moans, grunts, and sighs either. "Sounds of sex are sexy and a turn-on," Britton says. 

Mistake 3: Taking It Out of Context

Often men forget that sex doesn't happen in a vacuum. A man may wonder why he's unhappy with the sex he's having and not connect that with how he and his partner are getting along. A woman may not open up sexually with a partner if she doesn't feel safe emotionally with him. "For many women it takes a feeling of being vulnerable to let herself be explored," Britton says.
Your recent behavior follows you into bed with a woman, too. "She's still thinking about how you've been the week before, the day before, the hour before," Donaghue says. "Foreplay begins the week before, when you take the trash out."

Men can also be clueless about timing. "Very often I hear women complaining that, ‘My partner tries to initiate sex at the absolute wrong times, always,'" Taormino says. There's an easy fix for that, she says: "People let us know what they want all the time. I think we just have to pay attention."

A woman may literally tell you what she wants to do at various times of the day, Taormino says. If she doesn't mention sex, that might be a cue to wait. Men also have to remember that most women need more time than men to become aroused. "Men can get aroused quickly and get on their way," Taormino says. But for many women, the right time for sex would be when she isn't rushed.

Mistake 4: The "Get It Done" Mind-set

Men tend to think of sex like a mission. They break it down into steps -- erection, foreplay, penetration -- aimed at achieving a main objective: orgasm.
That can be a mistake for a couple of reasons. One is that a whole world of sexual experience exists beyond the genitals. "Our entire body can be utilized as erotic," Donaghue says. "Look at the whole body as a map, and conquer all the territory."
"I know women who can have an orgasm from having their nipples played with," Taormino says. "There are women who love to kiss and make out. All of that is part of sex."
Another reason why it's a mistake to focus solely on orgasm is sometimes it doesn't happen -- even for men. At those times, people can end up feeling bad about sex that may have been good in other ways.
Taormino says some men get upset if they can't give a woman an orgasm. "I hear from women a lot that they're already putting pressure on themselves to have an orgasm, and there's an added layer from their partner," Taormino says. The women may say it's OK -- that they still enjoy sex without orgasm, and don't need to have one every time. "But these guys don't believe them," Taormino says, because they're locked in a goal-oriented mind-set. Their attitude is... Get that orgasm done!"
Donaghue says sex should be thought of as a circular process, like a merry-go-round that you can step on and off whenever you like. "There is no goal," he says. "There's no such thing as ‘not finishing' or failure."


Mistake 5: "I'm All She Needs"

Many women are interested in using, or have used, sex toys. 
"Sex toys [represent] a place where men's egos can really get in the way and be bruised way too easily," Taormino says. A man may feel threatened by a woman's use of sex toys if he believes his own body parts should be enough to satisfy her. Taormino says men who reject sex toys "walk away from a really big opportunity to broaden their partner's pleasure."
A vibrator can deliver focused, consistent, intense stimulation that's impossible for a human to provide. Many women need that kind of stimulation to have an orgasm. "That's OK," Taormino says. "It doesn't mean she's broken. It doesn't mean she's strange."
"Bringing toys into sex play, and making toys a couples activity, is really the new paradigm," Britton says. There are also sex toys that can stimulate both partners at the same time. "Embrace it, get used to it, and go along for the ride, literally."

Mistake 6: Ringing the Doorbell

Most guys have a general idea of what the clitoris is and where to find it. But many don't know all there is to it. "The clitoris is not this tiny button on the outside of the body, which is what most people think it is," Taormino says.
How often men have sex varies greatly by their age and relationship status, according to a national survey published in 2010 in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. That survey shows differences based on whether men were single, married, or had a long-term relationship other than marriage.
Age also mattered. For instance, married men tend to have sex less often every decade after age 30. But that doesn't mean that their sex lives got worse as they got older. How often you have sex may have little to do with how satisfied you are sexually, Taormino says.
"People say, 'We have sex a lot,' or, 'We only have a little,'" she says. "But when I probe further, what constitutes a lot or a little is wildly different."
And what you consider "a lot" or "a little" can change over time. Having sex twice a week might seem like a lot to you when you're single, and not so much when you're a newlywed. If you have kids and have been with your partner for a decade or more, it might seem like a lot again.
"We need to change our expectations and reframe how we think about this," Taormino says. "You've got to acknowledge that people change, the dynamic will change, and be OK with that."
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Sunday 29 September 2013

SAY YES TO SEDUCTION


SAY YES TO SEDUCTION

It's time to embrace your sexy side. If you've been holding back in bed, we're willing to bet your guy wishes you weren't. In fact, we have a pretty good idea of what he'd like you to be doing. While it's not all about him, there are a few things you can do that will make him crazy (in a good way) and at the same time make things much more enjoyable for you. Read on to find out how to enhance your time between the sheets.
Woman with boyfriend having sex

1
TELL HIM WHAT YOU WANT

If the movies are any indication, as soon as we slide into bed with someone, both parties know exactly what to do for an instant-orgasm and a great time in bed. While this scenario isn't unheard of, it's also not the norm. Just like you want to please him, he's hoping that you like whatever it is he's doing, and if you're not, he wants to know what he should be doing instead. Guys like it when you're as involved in the proceedings as they are and are willing to speak up if need be.

It's all in how you tell a guy what you want. Rather than saying "I don't like that," be more of a director instead, leading him towards the experience that will get you the most pleasure. Guys like when you know what you want and have the confidence to express it.

2
EXPRESS YOUR PLEASURE

Quiet in bed? Try turning up the volume and see how much your man likes what he hears. We're not suggesting you fake it or put on some sort of cheesy act for him, but if you're enjoying yourself, we say tell him. He'll love that you're open and relaxed enough to voice your satisfaction, and chances are, it will turn him on even more. Being vocal in bed isn't a necessity, but you can bet that when you do choose to speak up during sex, he won't be complaining about it.

3
DITCH YOUR INHIBITIONS

We asked a few of our paired up guy pals about what they most wish their girlfriends would do in bed. While some were wholly satisfied with their sex lives (wouldn't change anything), the ones that thought there was room for improvement really wanted their partners to lose their inhibitions and body hang-ups and let loose in bed without fear of looking or sounding unattractive. Let's face it – sex is messy and sloppy and unpredictable, so if you can allow yourself to revel in the passion without worrying about what he thinks, you and your guy will be much happier.

"I love when my girlfriend can be totally relaxed in bed," said one 34-year-old high school teacher we spoke to. "I hate when she seems distracted in bed or just not completely comfortable. It takes away from the experience."

4
TRY NEW THINGS

Not every position, toy or fantasy is for everyone. We all have our own likes and dislikes when it comes to sex, but we're willing to bet your guy wouldn't mind if you wanted to shake things up in the sack by trying something new. Even if your sex life is fantastic, it can still be fun to experiment with different things – whether it's role-play, different seduction techniques or simply having sex at a different time of day than usual. You never know what might make what you have even better. Most guys we polled liked it when their partner was open minded about sex and willing to go outside the usual routine.

Trying new things is a great way to avoid falling into a sexual rut. Ruts are easy to fall into but much harder to get out of.

View the original article here

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10 Beauty Moves Guys Find Sexy

10 Beauty Moves Guys Find Sexy

1) When You Bare It All


Did you know that the average American woman spends almost $200 a year on her makeup? That's a shocking $13,000 spent over her lifetime. And the kicker: Our guys actually prefer our skin sans accompaniment.
"I love how she looks when she first wakes up, " says Keith, 36, of his fiancée, April. "Fresh, clean, natural. I hate when she piles on that cakey eye stuff. She still looks good, but she just doesn't look as much like herself."
Chris, 23, concurs. "I was actually drawn to [my girlfriend] Stephanie because she didn't wear makeup. She didn't really look like she was trying to be noticed. That was cool, you know?"
"She's never as gorgeous as she is just out of the shower," says Daniel, 30, of his wife, Gina. "When she’s all natural, scrubbed clean, and walking around in a towel — man, I love that. I actually proposed to her in that towel!"
"I absolutely hate lip gloss," says Taylor, 21. "My girlfriend's always trying to kiss me with it on, and it's so sticky! Seriously, why do you ladies like that stuff?"
"Lip gloss is the worst," says Taylor’s friend Rand, 22. "I can never get it off my face! It completely takes the romance out of kissing because I keep thinking about how annoying it is."

2) Your Belly


If you're like most of us, you've probably lost count of the millions of hours you've spent doing ab exercises. And that's the good news. The bad news? Turns out guys don't actually care as much as we think they do.
"I love her stomach!" says Derke, 30, of his wife, Lita. "It's too round," she protests. He maintains that it's "perfect. She's soft and feminine and I love that her body just fits with mine."
"[My wife] Irene's soft and curvy, and I love that about her," says William, 40.
"She's got all the right goods in all the right places," says Jermaine, 35, of the "significant lady" in his life. "As far as I'm concerned, there's a reason they call 'em 'love handles!'"
"I'm not perfect, so I definitely don’t expect [my girlfriend] Cate to be," says Ben, 29. "I love her, all of her, physically and mentally; I'm sure I would still love her if she dropped 10 pounds or dyed her hair pink, but I think she's exceptional just the way she is."
"She's only gotten more lovely with age," says Henry, 81, of his wife Edith. "Neither one of us have the bodies we used to, but I love each wrinkle and stretch mark. They're a testament to the life we've shared together. I didn't fall in love with her because she looked like Ava Gardner (which she did); I fell in love with her because she was the sweetest girl in the world, and that hasn’t changed in over 50 years of marriage.

3) When You Do That Thing You Do


One person's garbage is someone else's treasure. Let me put it another way: The right guy is going to find your weird habits absolutely adorable.
"She sings completely off-key," says Ivan, 38, of his wife, Rachele. "It's so endearing. When she sings in the shower, it's a beautiful, terrible symphony that never fails to make me smile."
"My girlfriend has a habit of twirling her hair that used to drive me up the wall," says Colin, 21. "Once we were dating a while, though, I realized that she only does it when she's deep in thought. Now it's really cute!"
"She leaves her bras everywhere," Phillip, 31, says about his wife, Helene. "On door handles, over the shower rod — I even found one on the coat rack once. It used to drive me crazy, but when she pointed out that I leave my [dirty] socks everywhere, I realized we're two peas in a pod."
"[My girlfriend] Tiffany and I have completely opposite tastes in music," says Sam, 22. "I'm more Talking Heads than Lady Gaga per se, but even though I only go to pop concerts with her to be supportive, I like that our separate interests mean we're both exposed to stuff we otherwise wouldn't be interested in knowing anything about."
"She has a knowledge of celebrity culture that is completely beyond me," says Pat, 24, of his girlfriend, Caroline. "I never know (or care about) anything that's going on in Hollywood, but she's can go on for hours about who's dating whom, and who just broke up with that guy from that movie, and what the new hit spots are. I think it's cute though; I mean, that's her thing, just like rugby is mine. We all need our own things; it's what keeps things spicy."

4) When You Toss the Hair Dryer


"Amy refuses to leave the house without stick-straight hair," says Steve, 23, of his naturally curly-haired girlfriend. "It's ridiculous! Every day, she spends hours in the bathroom using that straightener thing. I wish she'd leave it curly, at least a few days a week."
We're pretty sure that the "straightener thing" Steve was referring to is a flatiron, and we're even more sure that he's echoing the sentiment of many more guys out there: We like your hair just the way it is!
"This one's spent hundreds, no, thousands, of dollars on relaxers, extensions, perms, and color jobs over the years," says Clement, 45, of his wife, Cherie. "You name it, she's tried it. But eventually, she came to realize what I'd known all along: that she was blessed with beautiful hair naturally."
"Her hair was, honest to God, bright yellow," says Jason, 42, of a bad dye his wife had a few years ago. "I mean, it really looked terrible — like a highlighter. After that, she stopped coloring her hair, and I think she's never looked better."
"[My girlfriend] Danielle's got really thick hair," says Steve, 30. "She's probably in the bathroom about two hours every day, just working on her hair. Which is fine, except she thinks it only takes her about 30 minutes, so when we're running late for something and she says, 'Oh, I'm just going to hop in the shower and do my hair real quick,' it's frustrating. Every hair does not have to be perfect, woman!"

5) Your Eyelashes


"I love her eyes," says Trevor, 46. "Sometimes she looks at me under her lashes and it makes me want to head straight to the bedroom!"
"Right now, her eyelashes look so fluffy, says Derek, 24, who didn't know that his girlfriend was wearing falsies at the time. "Her eyes are one of her best features, so I love that her lashes make my attention goes straight there."
"Her eyelashes? Yeah, they're ridiculous," says Seth, 26, of his girlfriend's notoriously long lashes. "I actually noticed them right off the bat when we first met. She knows how to use them, too! She just looks at me, and I'm like, 'Okay, what do you want?'"
"His girlfriend's lashes are incredible," says Seth's friend Vik, also 26. "I’ve gotta get me a girl like that."
Take your lashes to the next level with these top top mascara picks.

6) Your Legs

This one's a no-brainer, ladies: big ones, small ones, short ones, long ones, they're all good as far as the menfolk are concerned.
"They're so smooth!" says James, 26, of his girlfriend Sarah's legs. "I love the way they feel. And when she wears heels? Forget about it. Her legs are insane."
"I'm a leg man myself," says David, 43. "I can't resist my wife when she crosses and uncrosses her legs. She knows it, too!"
"Why do I like women's legs? I'm not sure I have a good answer," says Nate, 32. "I just do. They're elegant, you know? And smooth! Women always have such smooth legs, and, as a guy, I guess I'm attracted to things that are different, that I don't have, if that makes sense. It's why I like boobs, too — cause I don't have them!"
"Oh, I'm definitely a leg man," says Lars, 51. "I don't even care what the rest of her looks like, but if a woman has a nice pair of legs, I'm down for the count. Hey, your legs are pretty good. How about it?" he propositions this reporter. "You could be wife number three!"
No thanks, Lars. But, we do hear you, lads. If wielded the right way, a woman's legs can be a powerful weapon. Our advice? Take care of your legs, and they'll take care of you.

7) Your Style


Time to break out the feathersbright nail polish, and all those other trends you love, because, fashionable or not, nothing makes you sexier than you being you.
"Sandy has a style that's completely her own," says Dennis, 51, of his wife of 27 years. "She's always been a free spirit, and I love that she wears crazy hats and dresses over pants."
Patrick, 33, loves that his wife wears her bright red hair in a spiky pixie cut and refuses to wear high heels. "She knows what works for her, and I love that!" he says. "She used to do ballet, so she said after years of being up on her toes, she's going to wear flats from now on. Honestly? I don't care. She'll always be sexy to me, no matter what she wears or how she looks."
"I'm pretty subdued, so it was a real change to date someone who dresses more flamboyantly," says Mike, 44, of his girlfriend Eva's recent birthday outfit: a sequined, backless dress, feathered hair-piece, and hot pink crocodile booties. "I love it, though. It's always a reflection of her personality, and she always looks amazing."
When Robert, 47, showed up for a blind date with Maggie, he wasn't expecting to be meeting the girl in the Shakespearean garb. "She worked at a nearby Renaissance fair, and had just gotten off work," he said. "At first I thought it was weird, but then I was like, 'Okay, yeah, this girl is awesome!'" That was seven years ago, and the couple got engaged two years ago. "She actually totally got me into the Renaissance fair circuit," he says, "and I love it!"

8) Your Scent


"I don't know how she does it, but she always smells delicious," says Brent, 29, of his girlfriend, Cate. "Even when she just gets out of the shower!"
"I love inhaling her right here," says Damien, 35, pointing to the area of his girlfriend Veronica's neck right under her ear, where she says she applies Burberry's The Beat perfume every morning. "She smells amazing, all sexy and soft."
Mike, 30, loves his fiancĂ©e Nadine's Jo Malone Vanilla & Anise perfume. "All her stuff smells like it," he says. "I love when I wake up and she's gone, I can still smell it on her pillow."
Tyler, 26, says his girlfriend "asked for a bottle of Stellanude by Stella McCarthy for her birthday, and now I know why. She smells incredible in it. It's seriously like an aphrodisiac for me. All I can think about is her wearing nothing except that perfume."
Use our fragrance finder to help find your signature scent.

9) When You Ask for What You Want

"Take it from me," says Dean, 45. "The key to a successful relationship is for the woman to go into every situation assuming that her mate is dense. Like me and my wife. I don't get subtleties. Our relationship improved ten times when she finally stopped implying things she wanted and started asking straight out."
"My wife's pretty bossy," says Peter, 67. "But that can be a good thing. At least I know what she wants!"
"I'm not a mind reader!" says Mike, 25. "I'll be honest — I rarely know exactly why my girl's frustrated or mad at me. We finally had it out, and she realized she needs to be more open with me."
"My one complaint about my [new] girlfriend is that I wish she would speak up more about what she needs and wants from me...sexually speaking," says Adam, 34. "She's shy and kinda self-conscious maybe, which is fine, but I'm never sure if I'm doing what she wants me to do."
"I think directness [in bed] is sexy," says Jake, 28. "When a woman takes charge, it takes the pressure off of me and lets me relax and enjoy the ride."
"Nothing's more of a turn-on for me than when my girlfriend tells me what to do in bed," says Xavier, 36.
Moral of the story: In bed and out, make sure your guy knows what you like — how will he find out otherwise?

10) Your Job


"My wife used to be a professor of women's studies," says Al, 72. "I love that her longtime passion about women's rights helped her find a job where she was able to help others appreciate themselves better and fight for their rights."
"Maybe this sounds silly," says Garrison, 42, "but I find my wife sexiest when she puts on her power suit before a big meeting. I don't know — maybe it's the fact that it reflects how smart and capable and passionate she about her career, but that suit does the trick better than any French maid costume."
"She works in an elementary school," says Samuel, 49, of his wife, Annie. "I love watching her with her kids. It's absolutely amazing to see the way they respond to her. And when I see how fulfilled she is in her career, I'm just so happy to have married a beauty with brains, too."
"My girlfriend's in public relations," says Hector, 26, "which is something I know nothing about, but it's very cool to watch her at work — she's always on the go. I really admire her and everything that she's done. She came to America when she was 14, and went on to graduate from an Ivy League school and have a really successful career. Is that a turn-on? Definitely. I love that she's smart!"