8 Compliments Guys Actually Want to Hear From Girls

It turns out compliments that don’t come from mom or other female relatives are something of a rarity for guys, according to the men of internet hive mind Reddit. No matter how many ladies appear to be chasing after handsome, bearded, great-smelling, compassionate, manliest dudes, it seems guys don’t actually get told they’re handsome, have great facial hair, smell fantastic, and so on nearly enough times.
 

So when this Redditor asked guys what compliments they want to hear from girls, naturally the list went on for awhile. Here’s a short list of some nice things guys would like to hear from ladies:

 

That they smell real nice.

 

That they’re going to save the world.

That they make you laugh (with them, not at them.)

 

That the facial hair they obsess over is flawless. Bonus points if you’re another bearded man yourself, in which case the rest of this post is probably not relevant:

That their manly manliness overwhelms you, like this:

Or this:

 

Really, you can pretty much tell them anything ever and call it a win.

 

Like just telling them they’re cute.

 

 

Or maybe don’t tell them they’re cute. Anything but cute.

 

Try handsome. No one strikes out with handsome, not even moms.

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Acceptance Provides Foundation for Love

By Carol Secord 

With the encouragement of St. Valentine, during February I often focus more on relationships and love than during other months.
 I believe acceptance is the foundation of love. Only if and/or when we can accept others, as they are, with all their pluses and minuses can we truly love them and relate lovingly with them.
 This applies to spouses, children, friends, co-workers and even humanity in general.

Therefore, I was very interested to read of “acceptance therapy,” in the book, “Reconcilable Differences,” by Andrew Chistensen and Neil S. Jacobson. The psychologist/authors describe how couples can use “integrative couples therapy” to resolve their differences.

It is a self-help approach which boils down to learning to truly accept one another as we are, without the struggle to change the other.

Basic to this concept is the fact that we cannot actually change another person.

Certainly, change can take place for individuals and in relationships, but not through criticism and coercion by another. Yet many of us go through internal as well as external conflict in our desire to change others.

The expectation that they should change is the opposite of acceptance.

Applying the acceptance concept within a relationship can result in giving up expectations and conflicts based on non-acceptance.

In the process, the relationship can be greatly improved as the stress of conflict is decreased.

I was counseling a couple who were considering divorce.

When I asked what the problem was, they each enumerated a list of petty criticisms of the other.

Taken individually, each of the points mentioned was minute.

As I jotted down their complaints, one by one, I could see that not one of them was worth the stress they had been experiencing within the relationship. The problem was that they had each piled new non-acceptance upon previous ones, until their marriage was truly endangered.

A stress management book, entitled, “Is It Worth Dying For?” suggests that as individuals we may be killing ourselves as a result of the little things we allow to stress us.

This principle is just as valid when applied to relationships. So I asked the couple if their list of little irritants was worth allowing the relationship to die.

Deciding to accept one another as we are, without the expectation of change, can relieve the stress of conflict, allowing respect and love to thrive, rather than to die.

It would be ideal if all relationships started out with the basic attitude of acceptance and then maintained that as little faults and irritants are revealed.

However, too many people observe differences in others which they interpret as faults and erroneously believe they can change them. When that doesn’t work and additional differences are observed, the lists of petty details may indeed kill the relationship.

Perhaps this is most clearly seen in coupleships, but the concept is just as valid in family relationships and friendships.

How often do we allow little criticisms to get in the way of respect and love?

Turn off the criticism, through acceptance, and you’ll experience non-judgmental love.

Instead of expecting or forcing change, we can accept each other’s differences and appreciate our individuality.

And that acceptance can make all the difference!

Why don’t we all make this a focus for February?

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10 Signs of Low Testosterone in Women

Testosterone hormone in women is emitted from the ovaries and adrenal glands, with levels of the hormone naturally increasing during puberty and pregnancy and decreasing with age and the onset of menopause. However, a sudden drop in testosterone can affect a woman’s libido, energy levels, and mood.

Here are ten common signs of low testosterone in women…

 

1. Fatigue

Women with decreased testosterone levels often notice a sudden drop in their energy levels. It may manifest itself as having trouble getting out of bed, or you may just feel zapped of energy all the time even though you’re getting adequate sleep.

2. Disrupted Sleep

Low levels of testosterone in women can also interrupt healthy sleep patterns. For instance, affected women may suffer bouts of insomnia, sleep apnea, or just struggle with frequent waking and other sleep disturbances during the night.

3. Weight Gain

Weight gain commonly shows itself in women affected by low testosterone. For instance, a loss of muscle tissue may be followed by a sudden unexplained increase in body fat, particularly around the area of the abdomen.

4. Decreased Libido

As we age, many of us tend to be less sexually active. However, when testosterone is low, women experience more sudden and extreme sexual changes—including reduced libido, vaginal dryness that makes intercourse very painful, and a general disinterest in sexual intimacy.

5. Depression

Depression, mood swings, and other unexplained emotional symptoms can be caused by decreased testosterone because the hormone helps to regulate many physical processes in their bodies—including the regulation of mood and mental focus.

6. Osteoporosis

Bone deterioration is another common result of lowered testosterone in women. This sudden weakening of bones occurs when testosterone diminishes and no longer aids in bone production and strength, leaving women affected prone to bone fractures.

7. Irregular periods

The sudden drop in testosterone hormone can also result in absence of menstrual periods. It may show itself in other menopausal symptoms as well—including irritability and hot flashes.

8. Anxiety

Even though testosterone is considered a “male” hormone, studies link a decrease in essential levels to a high instance of increased anxiety due to drastic hormonal fluctuations.

9. Hair Loss

Hair loss is one of the more visual symptoms of low testosterone, as the hormone supportshealthy hair production. This can cause hair patchiness or even balding in affected women.

10. Anorgasmia

Anorgasmia, or the inability to have orgasms, is a common symptom for women with plummeting testosterone levels. This difficulty with achieving pleasure from sex is usually accompanied by a drastic drop in sexual desire overall.

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Would this photo remind you to have a baby?

Would this photo remind you to have a baby?

A pregnancy testing company in the UK has come under fire for a campaign designed to "Get Britain Fertile", which seems to criticise women for waiting too long to start their family. Rebel Wylie investigates.

Lot’s of things make me clucky. The sight of my own kids soundly sleeping, that newborn baby smell or hearing a newborn make that tiny meow cry, even adverts with precocious little people in cute clothes make my uterus give me a nudge. Would an image of a pregnant elderly lady make me clucky? Probably not, but if time was ticking and procreating was on the agenda, it may make me think twice about getting my act in gear.

First Response has launched a campaign to get Britain fertility fit, including an image depicting 46-year-old TV presenter Kate Garraway dressed up to look like a heavily pregnant 70-year-old. First Response and Garraway claim that the provocative image is supposed to act as a kind of fertility wake-up call – a well-meaning attempt to reinvigorate the well-worn discussion of “how old is too old to have a baby?”.

Has it worked?

The overwhelming response has been negative. Social media has resounded with posts like:

“Kate Garraway’s Get Britain Fertile campaign is wrong, misogynistic and utterly naive,” and “Women struggling with fertility or lack of partner do not need a campaign in their face with wrinkly old mum & ‘Get Britain Fertile’ message’.”

One thing is for certain, good or bad, the image certainly has rocketed the campaign into the public conscience.

Whether a woman chooses to have her children in her 20s, 30s or 40s, it is her decision. You’d have to live under a rock to be unaware of the issues arising from delaying too long, so it’s pretty obvious that if a woman waits until her forties to start reproducing it’s not because she suddenly realised she’d forgotten to do it earlier. No, waiting until you’re older to have a baby is a complex choice that this kind of advertising is unlikely to influence. So let’s park the whole debate about women leaving it too long for one moment and instead, take a moment to look at some pros and cons for starting a family at different life stages:

• Have them in your 20s you’ll still be young enough to enjoy the freedom you’ll get when they’ve flown the nest. You’ll be savvy with the lingo and there’s a good chance their circle of friends will consider you the ‘hot mum’. Bonus! On the cons side, you’ll probably have to watch your mates post Facebook updates about their European holiday while you manage nappy changes and cracked nipples. Bummer!
• Have them in your 30s you won’t be either the too young or too old parent in the school ground. It’s highly likely that most of your friends will be going through the same thing as you at the same and you’ll form a great network, keeping each other informed when yoga pants and wine are on special. Neither young, nor old, you’ll boringly be right in the middle of the baby-making demographic. Y-A-W-N!
• Have them in your 40s and you’ll be satisfied you’ve lived fully before settling down. You might find it exhausting but your better financial security will mean your house will probably be big enough to have plenty of places to hide.

Whatever you decide has to be because it works for you. Pressure from your partner, friends, family and even advertising may make you feel like you have to rush into a decision. Arm yourself with knowledge about what delaying will mean for your chances, then look at the life that you want to live and go from there. Whatever you decide, good luck and have fun trying!

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The Under F**ked Pussy Epidemic (Every Woman Needs To Read This!!)

“A good orgasm is satisfying, but a great orgasm can be a revelation of your deepest being, unfolding the truth of who you are in ecstatic communion with your lover.” — David Deida

 Recently I was speaking with a young woman about her orgasms and her state of emotion. She shared with me how she had been diagnosed with depression and ADHD, how Peri-Menopausal Symptoms (PMS) was terrible for her and how she felt that she needed a man in her life to protect, save and hold her. She had been abandoned by the men in her past and had gained an ill understanding of her own heart and soul. Disconnected from her pussy and from her true self she exhibited self-hatred and shame, she felt embarrassed and lacked confidence, yet tried to hide all of this under a bubbly, loud personality with a beaming smile and flashy sex drive. Practically throwing herself at men, begging for their attention so she could survive one more day and pretend that for that moment she had love in her life.

The Importance Of Gourmet Orgasms

As I sat there listening to her story, watching the emotions cross over her face I could feel her pain, I found myself wanting to just embrace her and tell her that everything would be okay, but that was the protective mama bear in me.

Instead I chose to be honest and share the facts, “Sounds like you need to be properly f-ked my dear,” is what I responded.

She looked at me and said, “What?”

I restated it, “It sounds like you need to be properly f-ked, I don’t mean go have sex, just some junk food sex, I mean you need some gourmet, yummie, fulfilling f-king. You need an orgasm that fills your whole body.”

She looked at me a bit taken back and then responded with,”Oh I just had sex, I had an orgasm, a good one. It was very good.”

“But was it fulfilling and gourmet?”

“Yes, yes I think it was. Maybe it was not exactly as gourmet as you are speaking of, but it was awesome.”

“Did it fill your whole body with rapture? Were you tingly and full of energy for days to come or did you grow tired and the orgasmic feeling passed through you within a few hours?”

A confused look came upon her face.

Orgasm Is Mandatory For A Woman To Live an Abundant, Happy & Healthy Life

Here is the problem: this world is suffering from the majority of women not having real orgasms, shit most women don’t even have orgasms at all, they fake them, they hide out in their minds and they grow bitter toward life. Those who do have an orgasm normally rely on a clitorial quick fix or tighten their bodies up so much during an orgasm that it is short lived and never fills their whole being; body, heart and soul. They lack the orgasmic rapture that they need. Orgasm is mandatory for a woman to live an abundant, happy, healthy, full life. And not just any old orgasm will do this. The deeper, more penetrating an orgasm, the more life and creative energy, love and surrender a woman will bring to the world. To you.

• When her emotions become muted and she is closed, lacking expression toward life she is close to running on empty in her orgasmic bank account.
• When she is overly hateful or stuck in depression, full of what seems to be crazy hormonal ups and downs she is lacking in her orgasmic bank account.
• When she lays down and has sex but is indifferent to what happens in the bedroom or cannot share her desires, her boundaries and her fears she is lacking in her orgasmic bank account and this is where the trouble resides.

The Darkness of Pussy Frustration

Worse yet, she won’t tell you the truth about what is going on because she herself does not understand. Even if she has a clue her voice will be seized by the darkness of her pussy frustration and her ego will have hold of her so strongly that she won’t be capable of vocalizing the unspeakable to you. That unspeakable being that she needs to be f-ked wide open by a man that can penetrate not only her flesh but her heart and soul. She needs his strength, his firmness, his masculine energy to be unleashed in her at a cellular level and TAKE her beyond the point of no return and right into the heavens of rapture. Only at this level can she trust her man and allow herself once again to be seen.

As Nicole Daedone, author of Slow Sex states,

“Running on empty is not what you want your woman to be, unless you like irritability, impatience, hypersensitivity, and for everything to be your fault. Because in the space between what she asks for and what she really wants, resentment will begin to fester. And you, sir, will be the one she blames.

Find out what she is hungry for, and give it to her. Never accept her first answer. Ask again. And again. Make it a part of your game plan to prod and push until she releases what she is withholding and her desire comes flying out. At first, her desire might sound like anger. She may need to blow off steam. Don’t take it personally, even if she says hurtful things.

“Keep asking until you feel her true desire release. You will feel it in your body when she finally lets go. Regardless of how much resistance she has, don’t stop asking until you feel it. You are helping her unravel a lifetime of conditioning – old beliefs and habits and rules that are suffocating the bright, lovely, sexy woman within.

“That’s the woman you want to be with. So if you have to ask all night, ask all night. You’ll know it when she finally speaks her desire because you will be able to feel it, landing with a satisfying *thunk in your body.

“Then give it to her, and you’ll be giving her the thing she never thought she could get: not just the desire, but approval for having the desire at all. ”

Women: Ask For What You Sexually Want & Need

What Nicole is stating here is the powerful truth and it is hard to understand for many men because men have the ability to state what they need or want clearly most of the time. Men have also been raised differently then women and do not have the same shame placed upon them for wanting or needing sex. It is expected that a man craves, thinks about and will ask for sex. It is common thought in many marriages and in society that it is the woman’s place “to make sure to keep her man happy, else he will surely stray and find it somewhere else” but for a woman to be open about her cravings labels her a whore or slut. Even if we are not aware of this low grade consciousness and believe ourselves to be above this sort of thinking, the consciousness and programs still exist for all of us. They lay there in the covers of darkness within our psyche and if we are women they make themselves known pretty quickly as soon as we face our undernourished needs.

Men: Ask Your Women What She Desires

So gentlemen or those in the masculine role of the relationship, never stop asking your woman what she desires. Never stop inquiring about her deep hungers. Dig in her cavern and find the treasures she has hidden there, tell her frequently that you love her, that she is your babe, your special lady, your love. Touch her often and playfully and set aside time to REALLY be with her. This is not meaning a movie and dinner or even snuggle time on the couch, this means eye to eye, deep focused communication time. Communicate your love with words, looks and touch and ALWAYS keep asking. She will open to you.

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Once the honeymoon period is over most relationships fall into a comfortable pattern that might be short on the fireworks of the first year, but provides a stability and intimacy that feels great. 

5 Signs Your Relationship Is Ending

However, if that comfortable groove has started to feel more like an apathetic rut it might be time to take a long, hard look at your relationship and see if it’s likely to stand the test of time. Here are five ways to tell if your relationship is on the rocks…

You don’t communicate

If you come home from work, stick the telly on and don’t speak to each other beyond the occasional “Pass the crisps”, you’re in trouble. Communication is the key to every relationship and without it minor issues can flare up into fights and you’ll both end up feeling unloved and indifferent. If you don’t want to talk to each other about how your day was or chat and laugh together anymore, it’s a clear sign that you’re losing interest.

You rarely have sex

Once the initial excitement of a new relationship has worn off you will naturally have a bit less sex, but a strong desire for your partner and regular sex make for a healthy, functioning relationship. It may just be that your sex life has got a little bit routine and injecting some zest with a little bit of experimentation will put things back on an even keel, but if you still aren’t feeling it, it’s probably time to wave goodbye.

You imagine life without your partner

If you find yourself constantly having daydreams that fail to feature your partner it’s time to ask yourself some questions. You might long for a home free of their clutter and chat, or fantasise about a date with that hot new colleague, or wish you could just take a holiday alone: whatever it is, you’ve started to emotionally detach.

You pick fights

If you find your partner irritating and can’t resist constantly picking them up on their habits then the writing is on the wall. Relationships require empathy, compassion and compromise to keep going, so if you’ve jacked all that in in favour of snapping and bickering it’s time to get out of there.

You forget about the little things

Whilst big gestures are thrilling and romantic they don’t help maintain a relationship on a day-to-day level. A recent study funded by the Economic Science and Research Council found that the simple things – such as bringing your partner a cup of tea in bed – nurture a relationship much more than grand romantic gestures. If you’ve forgotten about those little things and rarely think to do anything for your partner, from offering them a cuppa to giving them a cuddle, then it’s time to forget about the whole thing and move on.

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...is he the one?

Is he the one? What makes a great Soul Mate relationship? By Lisa Turner

There’s a theory that somewhere out there is the perfect partner for you. You’ll meet. There will be music and doves. You’ll fall in love and live happily ever after. If you’ve bought into this myth yet failed to find “the one” then don’t beat yourself up. It’s an idea that’s as old as fairy tales, and just as unrealistic. Relationship expert Lisa Turner explains!

The idea that there’s only ONE person for you and that you need to find them puts enormous pressure on you to pick the right one, and if you think you have found him, it then puts enormous pressure on the Relationship to be perfect forever.

However the truth about soul mate relationships is far more empowering and fun. And it works something like this. According the psychologist Carl Jung’s theory of Perception is projection, we can only perceive in others what is within ourselves although that may be hidden deep in our unconscious. That which is at most unconscious we project onto our most intimate relationships. So all those annoying habits that our partners do are within us, only we aren’t conscious of them which is why we are aware of them (and annoyed by them) in our partners.

Now this is great news. Because it means your true soul mate is the person who will help you grow the most.

So rather than looking for the one, it’s more empowering to create a Relationship that works and here are the signs of a healthy relationship.

· He empowers you and uplifts you. Being with him makes you feel great and you know you are stronger as a team than you are when you’re alone.
· You feel great when you’re on your own and even better where you’re together. This is called synergy.

· He encourages you to do what you want and what is truly good for you, rather than sulking or grumbling because it might mean you would be spending time apart from him.

· He’s honest with you, even if it means telling you what you don’t want to hear, but is good for you. False flattery doesn’t do you any favours, so he’ll be honest about where you are, and still help you to get to where you want to be.

· He makes you feel good about yourself. So do watch out for anyone who belittles you, undermines you or makes you dislike yourself.

· You are both happy to be with each other, and also happy to spend time apart. You each know that spending time doing what you Love energises and revitalises you so that when you are together again the sparks fly.


Soul Mate Myths
1. You’re not complete until you find your soul mate - This is the basis for a dysfunctional co-dependent relationship that’s based on need.

2. When You Meet Your Soul Mate You’ll Fall Deeply In Love And Live Happily Ever After. Not necessarily, your soul mate is the person who will help you to grow the most. So a relationship with your soul mate might be anything but smooth sailing.

3. Soul mates will have exactly the same interests - Rather than interests it’s values that make a great relationship. But they don’t need to have the same values they simply need to respect each other’s values. Specifically each person needs will be aware of what’s important to the other person and respect that. Finding each other’s values and how to satisfy them is what makes relationships so exciting, and can bring challenges too.

4. Soul Mates never argue
Actually they will likely argue a lot. being with your soul mate means you feel comfortable and safe enough to have disagreements. Feeling that you shouldn’t ever argue puts huge pressures on the relationship because should a disagreement arise (and they will) they then assume that it means they aren’t with the right person. So even a minor disagreement means that one or both start thinking “he’s not the one” and to imagine they need to separate and find the real “one”. Soul mates will disagree and it’s the emotional maturity they bring to it that makes them such great soul mates.

Twin flame
The theory is that Twin Flames are created when a single soul was split into its male and female parts. The theory is that these two people were then born and their purpose in life is to seek out their twin flame who would complete them.

Unfortunately not only is the idea that any human is half a person without another person fundamentally disempowering it also doesn’t make much sense.

How could anyone have half a soul? Even mathematically this makes no sense. A soul is infinite. If you divide infinity in half – you still get infinity (trust me I used to be a mathematician). So from this perspective it simply doesn’t work.

To believe that you need someone ELSE to complete you or to make you feel ok is based on the premise that you are somehow incomplete, lacking or not ok on your own. Any relationship based on this are doomed to failure because they will ultimately become co-dependent.



About the Author: Lisa Turner is an emotional reslience expert, media commentator and the founder of personal development company Psycademy. She regularly appears in national newspapers, magazines, on the radio and on the TV, providing help and advice across all areas of emotional and spiritual wellbeing.

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