The 10 Best Love Letters Ever Written

The 10 Best Love Letters Ever Written

1. Ernest Hemingway to Marlene Dietrich

“I can’t say how every time I ever put my arms around you I felt that I was home.”

Source: Text, Image

2. Napoleon to Josephine

“Since I left you, I have been constantly depressed. My happiness is to be near you. Incessantly I live over in my memory your caresses, your tears, your affectionate solicitude. The charms of the incomparable Josephine kindle continually a burning and a glowing flame in my heart. When, free from all solicitude, all harassing care, shall I be able to pass all my time with you, having only to love you, and to think only of the happiness of so saying, and of proving it to you?”

Source: Text, Image

3. Frida Kahlo to Diego Rivera

“Nothing compares to your hands, nothing like the green-gold of your eyes. My body is filled with you for days and days. You are the mirror of the night. The violent flash of lightning. The dampness of the earth. The hollow of your armpits is my shelter. my fingers touch your blood. All my joy is to feel life spring from your flower-fountain that mine keeps to fill all the paths of my nerves which are yours.”

Source: Text, Image

4. Georgia O’Keefe to Alfred Stieglitz

“Dearest — my body is simply crazy with wanting you — If you don’t come tomorrow — I don’t see how I can wait for you — I wonder if your body wants mine the way mine wants yours — the kisses — the hotness — the wetness — all melting together — the being held so tight that it hurts — the strangle and the struggle.”

Source: Text, Image

5. Beethoven to his ‘Immortal Beloved’

“Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, Be calm–love me–today–yesterday–what tearful longings for you–you–you–my life–my all–farewell. Oh continue to love me–never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved. Ever thine. Ever mine. Ever ours.”

Source: Text, Image

6. George H. Bush to Barbara Bush

“This should be a very easy letter to write — words should come easily and in short it should be simple for me to tell you how desperately happy I was to open the paper and see the announcement of our engagement, but somehow I can’t possibly say all in a letter I should like to. I love you, precious, with all my heart and to know that you love me means my life. How often I have thought about the immeasurable joy that will be ours some day. How lucky our children will be to have a mother like you —”

Source: Text, Image

7. Ronald Regan to Nancy Reagan

“The important thing is I don’t want to be without you for the next 20 years, or 40, or however many there are. I’ve gotten very used to being happy and I love you very much indeed.”

Source: Text, Image

8. Oscar Wilde to Lord Alfred Douglas

“Everyone is furious with me for going back to you, but they don’t understand us. I feel that it is only with you that I can do anything at all. Do remake my ruined life for me, and then our friendship and love will have a different meaning to the world. I wish that when we met at Rouen we had not parted at all. There are such wide abysses now of space and land between us. But we love each other.”

Source: Text, Image

9. Henry VII to Anne Boleyn

“But if you please to do the office of a true loyal mistress and friend, and to give up yourself body and heart to me, who will be, and have been, your most loyal servant, (if your rigour does not forbid me) I promise you that not only the name shall be given you, but also that I will take you for my only mistress, casting off all others besides you out of my thoughts and affections, and serve you only. I beseech you to give an entire answer to this my rude letter, that I may know on what and how far I may depend. And if it does not please you to answer me in writing, appoint some place where I may have it by word of mouth, and I will go thither with all my heart. No more, for fear of tiring you.”

Source: Text, Image

10. Vita Sackville-West to Virginia Woolf

“But oh my dear, I can’t be clever and stand-offish with you: I love you too much for that. Too truly. You have no idea how stand-offish I can be with people I don’t love. I have brought it to a fine art. But you have broken down my defenses. And I don’t really resent it.”

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10 Human Things to Remember When Going on a First Date

These 10 human things to remember when going on a first date is what I use not only for dating. Dating is rather fun if you're you're really looking looking for a date. What I mean is you got a little acquainted with someone either online or offline and now is the fruits of your labours and you're actually going to have a "one to one" with the person you asked for the date. Mission accomplished!

But without getting all heavy dating coach on you all and going into a 4 hour seminar here are 10 human things to consider that will keep things light and fun.

1. Stop Seeing People as a Threat.

When we see people as a threat we will always be on the back foot in the relationship and communicate with the wrong mindset. Or as I see it you be a pilot with the completely wrong again of approach. What happens when the pilot has the wrong angle of approach? yep.... crash and burn!

What do I mean by the wrong angle of approach?

Here's an example. Many moons ago I hangout (first date...) with a girl that was an IT guru. I too worked in IT but nowhere near to her level. She also earned bucket loads of money more than me at the time. Some guys could have been put off by that believing that they should be top of the tree but my angle of approach was okay she had taken certain different steps in her life that got her to where she is today. She was still looking for a date and has a story to tell. What is that story? I want to hear her story... the subject of her work actually never came into the conversation at all. Turns out she was quite unhappy with her work anyway. 

2. Stop Competing with Others

In the above scenario I have seen and heard guys trying to upstage the girl by talking and impress upon her how much they know about x or y. Talking about work is fine especially as for most of us it's where we spend a lot of our time so unfortunately it does form a significant portion of their life so it's bound to come up in conversation. But rolling out your verbal resume probably isn't a good angle of approach lets say.

3. Stop Looking for Their Faults

This one is not just to do with dating, it also should be something to remember for life and anyone you meet. Remember whatever you centre you're thought on you tend to get more of.

It's often difficult for most of us as we have 'conditioning' that says we need to have some defenses up when we meet people. They almost have to prove us wrong before we can let them into our circle of trust. I think our reason it society says we shouldn't make mistakes or get used. Here's a beautiful quote I read recently that might explain:

“When we seek to discover the best in others, we somehow bring out the best in ourselves.” -William Arthur Ward

As we tiptoe through life we can judge quite harshly other people sometimes. Especially when they do something ends up being a wrong move which possibly could affect us. We judge their actions but in ourselves we only judge our intentions we have and are more quick to let ourselves off the hook but slow to do the same for other. 

The world can be a lot of fun when you turn this around and see others as human that make errors of judgement sometimes and usually there not malicious at all. They're just errors of judgement.

4. See Them as a Friend

Whenever I have had the pleasure of going on a date I assume that the girl is already my friend. This works really well and changes the stance to give a very good angle of approach. You not sitting across the table waiting for the girl to do something you dislike so you can then say to yourself "A-ha, I was right she got this wrong with her so she's not the one god this is a waste of time"! No, it's like, lets just have a giggle. Remember it's not a blind date. Something in your correspondence said that it would be good to meet. So go with it all and have fun. If you're not sure how or why start again reading what I've just written.  Also what's wrong with making a friend online anyway?  Which leads me to...

5. See Them as Fascinating and Interesting Even if They Don't See That in Themselves

I love to do this as I get so much out of it and we all know what we give is what we get. Also people are fascinating aren't they?

We all have had different upbringing (unless your dating your sister... eww) but through one thing or another your date ended up sitting across the table from you. Isn't that cool?

Isn't it just so keep that in mind. Because of that angle of approach I have never had a bad date ever. It's literally impossible.

6. Let Them Speak

Do let them speak if they want too. Sometimes if we are nervous we can either shut up complete or end up becoming a motor mother and go on and on (we I do anyway). I obviously if you date isn't very talk active and you can hear the crickets croaking in the next town as you sit peering at the top of his/her head because the face down staring at the floor then you can at least ask a question or two to get things warmed up. No, what I'm talking about is they're talking about something they find interesting and you have had a similar experience or also know something they don't, don't sit on the edge just waiting for them to draw breath so you can chime in with you super opinion before they finished their sentence. Feel the moment and the contentment within that you can let them have the stage. Remember they're fascinating beings so...

7. Be Interested to Know More About What they Want to Talk About.

Here is a really good tip to stop yourself from ever getting bored with anything in life and that is to "Dig Into It Deeper". It's easy to get bored with things you don't know enough about. If tell you they like tiddy-winks and once reached the nationals, make an effort to find out what was that like, how do you play it, the rules and the required skills and techniques, who long had they been playing, where is the club they belong to, what special skills had they learned etc...

Don't start checking your phone, watch or chat up the waiter while they're divulging something about themselves or their stories of life. I guess the old adage treat others how you'd like to be treated which is in essence what life is all about and leads on to another skill which is to...

8. Try and Find Common Ground Between You.

The goal of the actual date is to really try and find common ground between you. If you strive to do this then very least you're going to be to each other is good friends and who says they don't have enough friends of the opposite sex.

9. Don't Dwell On the Negative.

When you're getting to know more about them you might find the subject of what he/she starts to talk about is negative. If this the case try to subtly move the conversation to to something positive or put a positive spin on things. An example might be that there ex dumped them for the gas man -rather than let the subject continue on a downward spiral try to see if you can reframe her experience for them by saying how freeing it is in the end when you get of a problem relationship or "Well I bet it must have been a nightmare but I must say it looks like you came out of beautifully you seem so brave and strong willed."

10. Do Find Something Positive

As with the above example try you best to put a positive spin on everything, "within reason". Make it a game almost to see how good you can get at reframing everything in a positive way. This will not only cause a benefit not only for them but for you too. 

Hopefully this all makes sense, but it ideas that I have used not just for dating but also for meeting anyone as I gallop around the world. Of course if you have any comments jot them down below please do...

All the best,

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Why Do You Want To Be in a Relationship?

If you are a person who wants to be in a relationship, have you thought about why? Actually, there are two very different reasons for wanting a relationship. The first is about what you want to get, and the second is about what you want to learn and share.

Wanting a Relationship in Order to Get

If you ask people why they want a relationship, many will say things like:

• I want someone to love me and make me feel special and worthy.
• I don't want to be alone and lonely anymore.
• I want to have children.
• I want to feel safe and secure.

What they might not say outright is that they want a relationship to:

• Fill the empty place within them.
• Complete them. They hope that their partner will give them what they are not giving to themselves and what they might not have received as children.
• Make them feel taken care of emotionally, financially and/or sexually.

You might be thinking, "Right! Aren't these the reasons everyone wants a relationship? Why be in a relationship if not to be loved, cherished, made to feel special, safe and secure? What's the point of a relationship if not to fill me, take away my loneliness and make me feel okay about myself?"

There really is another reason for wanting to be in a relationship.

Wanting a Relationship in Order to Heal, Learn and Share Love

The other reason for being in a relationship stems from the fact that relationships are the most fertile ground for learning about what is unhealed in us, and for having an arena to heal. Most of us have baggage from childhood that we carry into our primary relationship -- such as fears of rejection and fears of engulfment. These fears generally get played out with a partner, which offers us an incredible opportunity to learn about and heal them. Relationship can be the Ph.D. of personal growth!

Learning about your fears of intimacy, as well as about control issues that may surface with a primary partner, can lead to much personal growth -- enhancing your ability to love. The more you learn to take responsibility for your own feelings -- learning to love yourself, cherish yourself, make yourself feel special and valued -- the more you may want a relationship in order to share your love rather than to get love. Contrary to what many believe, it's not the getting of love that takes away loneliness, but the sharing of love.

The most profound and beautiful experience in life is the sharing of love. But we can't share our love unless we are filled with love. When we learn to fill ourselves with love from our "Source" -- whatever that is for each person, such as nature, spirit, God, the energy of the universe -- then we come to our partner with inner fullness rather than with inner emptiness. Rather than needing a partner to complete us, we desire to share our completeness with our partner.

When two people come together to get love rather than to learn, heal and share love, there is a strong possibility that their relationship won't last. With both partners trying to get loved and filled by the other, and neither one having learned to love and fill themselves, each will ultimately be disappointed. Very often, one or both might believe they've picked the wrong partner.

When two people come together because they want to learn together, grow together, heal together, share their time and companionship, and share their love and passion, they have a good chance of creating a lasting, loving relationship.

When these people are asked why they want a relationship, they say:

• I have a lot of love to give and I want to share it with a partner, who also has a lot of love to give. Possibly, we might want to have children with whom to also share our love.
• I want to learn and grow with someone who also wants to learn and grow.
• I want to share time, companionship, lovemaking, laughter and play with someone with whom I feel deeply connected.

If you tune inside and honestly ask yourself why you want a relationship, and you find yourself on the first list rather than on the second, do not despair. You can learn how to love yourself and fill yourself with love so that you have plenty of love to share with a partner.

It's important to realize that we attract people at our common level of health -- which is the level of taking personal responsibility for our happiness and wellbeing -- or at our common level of self-abandonment -- which includes making someone else responsible for our feelings. Given this reality, you have a far better chance of creating a healthy and loving relationship with a partner when you have a healthy and loving relationship with yourself.

View the original article here

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Men are programmed to like breasts, but it isn't for the reasons scientists once thought. Credit: Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported | Gytha View full size image

New Theory on Why Men Love Breasts

Why do straight men devote so much headspace to those big, bulbous bags of fat drooping from women's chests? Scientists have never satisfactorily explained men's curious breast fixation, but now, a neuroscientist has struck upon an explanation that he says "just makes a lot of sense."

Larry Young, a professor of psychiatry at Emory University who studies the neurological basis of complex social behaviors, thinks human evolution has harnessed an ancient neural circuit that originally evolved to strengthen the mother-infant bond during breast-feeding, and now uses this brain circuitry to strengthen the bond between couples as well. The result? Men, like babies, love breasts.

The Love Drug

When a woman's nipples are stimulated during breast-feeding, the neurochemical oxytocin, otherwise known as the "love drug," floods her brain, helping to focus her attention and affection on her baby. But research over the past few years has shown that in humans, this circuitry isn't reserved for exclusive use by infants. [The Cleavage Countdown: 8 Facts About Breasts]

Recent studies have found that nipple stimulation enhances sexual arousal in the great majority of women, and it activates the same brain areas as vaginal and clitoral stimulation. When a sexual partner touches, massages or nibbles a woman's breasts, Young said, this triggers the release of oxytocin in the woman's brain, just like what happens when a baby nurses. But in this context, the oxytocin focuses the woman's attention on her sexual partner, strengthening her desire to bond with this person.

In other words, men can make themselves more desirable by stimulating a woman's breasts during foreplay and sex. Evolution has, in a sense, made men want to do this. 

Attraction to breasts "is a brain organization effect that occurs in straight males when they go through puberty," Young told Life's Little Mysteries. "Evolution has selected for this brain organization in men that makes them attracted to the breasts in a sexual context, because the outcome is that it activates the female bonding circuit, making women feel more bonded with him. It's a behavior that males have evolved in order to stimulate the female's maternalbonding circuitry."

Feeding Time

Breasts of Mary Zarring completely natural
 – She's afraid of plastic surgery

So, why did this evolutionary change happen in humans, and not in other breast-feeding mammals? Young thinks it's because we form monogamous relationships, whereas 97 percent of mammals do not. "Secondly, it might have to do with the fact that we are upright and have face-to-face sex, which provides more opportunity for nipple stimulation during sex. In monogamous voles, for example, the nipples are hanging toward the ground and the voles mate from behind, so this didn't evolve," he said. "So, maybe the nature of our sexuality has allowed greater access to the breasts."Attraction to breasts "is a brain organization effect that occurs in straight males when they go through puberty," Young told Life's Little Mysteries. "Evolution has selected for this brain organization in men that makes them attracted to the breasts in a sexual context, because the outcome is that it activates the female bonding circuit, making women feel more bonded with him. It's a behavior that males have evolved in order to stimulate the female's maternal bonding circuitry."

Young said competing theories of men's breast fixation don't stand up to scrutiny. For example, the argument that men tend to select full-breasted women because they think these women's breast fat will make them better at nourishing babies falls short when one considers that "sperm is cheap" compared with eggs, and men don't need to be choosy.  

But Young's new theory will face scrutiny of its own. Commenting on the theory, Rutgers University anthropologist Fran Mascia-Lees, who has written extensively about the evolutionary role of breasts, said one concern is that not all men are attracted to them. "Always important whenever evolutionary biologists suggest a universal reason for a behavior and emotion: how about the cultural differences?" Mascia-Lees wrote in an email. In some African cultures, for example, women don't cover their breasts, and men don't seem to find them so, shall we say, titillating.

Breasts on Show

Young says that just because breasts aren't covered in these cultures "doesn't mean that massaging them and stimulating them is not part of the foreplay in these cultures. As of yet, there are not very many studies that look at [breast stimulation during foreplay] in an anthropological context," he said...

View the original article here.

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