Sunday 30 June 2013

How to Make Him Want You

How to Make Him Want You

Sometimes in a long-term relationship you reach a point where it seems like the flame has just burned out, and that wild attraction you first had for each other has fizzled away. You still love each other, but the passion has taken a back seat to more practical priorities and a night of sultry, sizzling love-making is nothing more than a distant memory.
And you miss that feeling. You miss the days when he couldn’t keep his hands off you. You remember what it felt like for your man to reach for you during the night, and now it feels like sleeping with an uninterested stranger. You’re wondering if it’s possible to “bring back that lovin’ feeling.” What can you do to re-ignite the spark? How can you make him want you so bad he can’t wait to be alone with you?
Here are a few tips on how to get your groove back and make him want you all over again:
#1 Let him know that YOU want HIM!
Maybe he doesn’t try to get in your pants all the time anymore because he thinks you don’t want him to. He knows how busy  you are with your job and taking care of the kids and making dinner and all that you do, and he’s heard you tell him “I’m too tired” enough times that he just accepts that he’s out of luck. You’ve slipped into a routine that doesn’t include any hanky-panky so now your man is under the impression that you don’t want him that way. He probably thinks the only things you want him for are to take out the trash and fix the leak under the sink.

So the most important step in making him want you is to let him know that you want him. You can do this a few different ways- with subtle hints or with a bold move. Subtle ways to get your message across could include things like this: when you pass by him in the hallway, reach over and squeeze his tush. The bold move is to just come right out and say it: “Baby, I want you.”

The odds are in your favor. If your man realizes you actually want him to make a move he will probably rise to the occasion.

#2 Build anticipation.
Get him to think about you all day long… while he’s at work, while he’s at the gym, while he’s hanging out with his friends. Do something that will get his attention and keep it even while he’s not with you. You could write him a little love note and put it in his lunch box or briefcase. Say something like: “Let’s have some alone time tonight, you sexy thing,” or “I’ve got something to show you when you get home.” (Be prepared to show him a new teddy, or go nude under a trench coat.)

Another way to get yourself on his mind is for you to surprise him out of his ordinary morning routine by turning that quick goodbye peck-on-the-cheek as he leaves for work into a long, wet, passionate kiss. He won’t be able to concentrate on anything all day for thinking about you and that kiss.

#3 Make an effort with your appearance.
I know the sweat pants are really comfortable, and you barely have time to take a shower, much less shave your legs. But if you look like a harried housewife then you don’t look like you want some nooky. So go the extra mile with your appearance. Some would say men don’t notice when you are wearing a new outfit or you’ve done something different with your hair. I say make him notice. Go all the way, over the top, no holds barred.

Start from the skin out. Not only do you want to be clean and smelling great, you want your skin to be soft and smooth. Take time with your grooming, and you know what I mean. Then wear the clothes that make you feelsexy and that show off your best features. First, wear your sexiest bra and panties. You don’t want him to start undressing you and get turned off by the granny panties. If you have a favorite dress, wear that. When he comes in the door and sees you all dressed up, he might ask where you’re going or if you have plans he forgot about. Just say, “No plans to go out, sugarlips, I just wanted to look nice for my man.”
#4 Do something he likes.
You know your man, and you know what makes him happy. Make a special effort to give him something that you know he really enjoys. This could be any number of things, from making his favorite dinner to pole- dancing for him. Go to the video store and pick up his favorite movie, or wear the dress you know he likes. Buy him an item for his collection or something that goes with his hobby.
He’ll love you for it, and showing his appreciation could easily lead to really showing his appreciation, especially if you let him know you are willing.
#5 Give him “The Look.”
You know the one. That look you perfected back in your swinging single days when you could eyeball a hot guy from across the room and have him headed your way in a blink. Pick the right moment, a quiet time when you have his attention and the time to follow through with it. Then just look him right in the eye, with that little smile and the “come hither” expression.
This carries us right back to the first tip, letting him know you want him. Say it with your eyes. If he doesn’t get it at first, then try again. Men are easily led, especially by their nether regions, so just as soon as he realizes that you want him to want you, he’ll be all over you.

View the original article here


The Five Worst Questions You Can Ask On A First Date


The Five Worst Questions You Can Ask On A First Date

On a first date everyone is nervous about how the conversation will go, especially if it’s the first time you’re seeing each other face to face after meeting on a site such as eHarmony.
You want the conversation to flow nicely and be a good balance of each of you speaking about yourself, asking questions about the other and listening and showing interest. To get this balance right, it’s important to know what kind of questions and topics to avoid. Here are the top five worst date questions:
What was your last relationship like?
1Steer clear of any questions related to previous partners or break-ups – though you may be curious or genuinely interested, this is really not first date territory. You don’t want to be too intrusive.
Do you believe in God?
Don’t ask questions that are very personal such as how much money they make or what their religion or beliefs are. These kinds of questions are ones that you might go into after you’ve met up a few times. Getting into a debate or heated conversation could easily topple into disagreement or, worse, an argument.
Do you like me?

Do not ask him or her what they think of you, if they are attracted to you, or if they like you as a person. This will immediately make you appear insecure and needy. Besides, you can often gauge whether someone is having a good time from their body language or eye contact.

Nor is it a good idea to ask how you compare to previous partners of theirs – this is a question that will make them feel uncomfortable and put on the spot.
How many people have you slept with?
Again, this is too personal and far too soon. Asking about sexual partners could make the person feel incredibly awkward. A first date is all about flirting and as soon as you start talking directly about sex, your allure will disappear.
You don’t want to come across as somebody who is just looking for a casual encounter if you are actually looking for something long-term.
Do you have any pets?
Questions like this are unimaginative and boring, and to be honest, it will seem like you’re really scraping the barrel. Try to think of more open, creative questions that will engage your date and make them want to speak about themselves.
Instead of asking ‘do you listen to music?’, for example, you could say ‘what’s the best gig you’ve ever been to?’
What do I ask?

Stick to questions that your date will feel comfortable and happy to talk about, such as what they do for a living, their friends and family and their interests.
Remember not to bombard them with questions – this is not an interview. Just relax, speak confidently about yourself and listen and show interest in them. By handling the first date well and knowing what to say, you won’t scare away potential partners with whom you could have something serious.

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Tips for Successful Online Dating


Tips for Successful Online Dating

Brenda Molly Jeff
Photo: Whitebox Weddings 
In 2000, Brenda Allison graduated from law school and moved to Chicago. There, she found a supportive group of friends, an apartment within walking distance of the city's hottest spots...and absolutely no time to date. 

"I'm a lawyer, and it's a job that takes up a lot of time," she says. "I didn't know how I was going to meet someone, especially when with what little free time I had I wanted to spend it with my friends."

Heeding advice from friends living in New York City, Allison turned to the Internet. "There weren't a lot of people using the Internet to date back then," she says. "I had to go to Kinko's and scan in a picture of myself for my profile." Soon after that, she was on a date.

"I met this guy for drinks, and everything was going fine. I have a tendency to mess with my hair when I get nervous, so I start running my hands through it. An hour or so into the date, he looks me straight in the eyes and says: 'You have got to stop touching your hair because it's driving me crazy. I don't know if I'm going to be able to control myself!' I didn't know what to say to that, so I told him my friends were at the back of the bar, which they were. I never went out with him again."

For Allison, that night was the beginning of series of dating travails. Despite a few duds and near misses, her perseverance—plus an online connection seven years later that resulted in a marriage proposal—would eventually reaffirm her belief that online dating is an ideal way to make a real connection with another person. "Meeting someone in a bar never quite worked out," she says. "The bar scene was always about 'Hey baby, you're hot' after a few drinks."

Though once considered the sole province of the nerdy and socially challenged, online dating has come a long way. According to online dating site, more than 20,000 people register to use the site every day. eHarmony says it has 20 million registered users on its roster and according to a recent study it commissioned, the dating site is responsible for 2 percent of all marriages in the United States.

How are all of these people finding success in love online? According to experts, honesty, patience and a well-thought-out profile are all anyone needs to find true love.

View the original article here


Single Mom, Dating Guilt


Single Mom, Dating Guilt

Woman with a child
Photo: © 2009 Jupiterimages Corporation
Q: I'm a 45-year-old single mom, and I had a baby girl on my own from a donor a few years ago. What I'm finding is, I feel guilty going out and dating and leaving my daughter with a sitter on weekend nights. Yet, I feel it is also unhealthy for me not to be out there fulfilling those needs for myself. What should I do?

— ThereseA: You have nothing to feel guilty about. It is one thing if you are working 24/7 all week and leaving your child for 20 dates on the weekend, but we are talking about a couple hours on a Saturday night or a Sunday afternoon. It is not good for your daughter to be your all-encompassing source of emotional connection. It is too much responsibility for a child. You may think a child can't have too much love, but when they're your only focus, it can really become too much.

Just start out dating slowly—go to coffee with someone, even during the week. Go out to lunch with someone or just try a couple of hours in an afternoon, and work your way up an evening date.

Also, I do hear from a lot of men that they often have concerns about single moms because they are worried about having to manage the biological father or the ex—but in your case (with a donor father), you are drama-free!

I'll bet once you dip your toe in the dating pool, you will enjoy it and meet interesting people. Get back out there!

View the original article here


Saturday 29 June 2013

The 10 Most Popular Sexual Fantasies


The 10 Most Popular Sexual Fantasies

Have you ever found yourself fantasizing about an unusual and dirty scenario whilst masturbating or having sex!? Well, you are not the only one! The conception that only men always think about sex and have the dirtiest imagination is out-dated. It has been proven that women almost think about sex as much as men do and every woman on earth has fantasized about some explicit sexual fantasy.
Although considered a taboo, sexual fantasies are normal, healthy and necessary for our sexuality. Acknowledging and satisfying our sexual instincts boosts endorphin levels, which reduces stress and therefore makes us feel more relaxed and happy. But what are the sex secrets women fantasize about the most?
10. Role-playing
This entails imagining yourself as someone else entirely in a sexually arousing situation. This varies from woman to woman. It could be that your secret desire is doing it with the sexy teacher that every student dreamed of whilst he “punishes” you for not doing your homework. Maybe something totally different.
9. Group sex
Being engaged in sex with multiple partners at the same time and being touched and penetrated by men and women simultaneously is something that arouses many women. To be truthful, it is renowned that women can reach an orgasm really fast if stimulated in more than one point at the same time.
8. Being dominated
A fantasy that became for sure far more common after a certain best-seller was published a couple of years ago! Submission leading to orgasm after surrendering to a master is a very popular fantasy among women.
7. Sex with a girl
Every woman, even if she is straight, is fundamentally attracted by other women and has at least once thought about having sex with another gorgeous and sexy girl.

6. Exhibitionism
The women of today are confident and independent so it is no surprise that many of them feel aroused in imagining that their sexual activity is watched by someone else who is in turn turned on by seeing you. This can actually be easily achieved by taping your next sexual performance! Just make sure to delete the video afterwards or put it in a super safe place.
5. Sex with a stranger
Well, who wouldn’t be aroused at the thought of meeting a sexy and mysterious stranger and have a wild night of uninhibited sex!? The situation will allow you to let go of all your control and don’t feel judged.
4. Private dancer
Many women fantasize about being strippers and some even about being prostitutes and being paid for their “services”.
3. Sex with 2 men
As women, the more attention we get the better. So what is better that having 2 men worshiping you and making you orgasm over and over again. Another version of this is also being able to satisfy 2 men at the same time. Sex Goddess!
2. Being the dominatrix
A really common fantasy among women is to be in control by wearing a strap-on penis and penetrating the man! Yes, you read that right, being the man for one night! Some are not quite so extreme, but still dream of taking control in bed by making him the sex slave.
1. The “safe” rape
According to recent research in America, 62% of women have rape fantasies. We are talking of an erotic rape fantasy here, rather than a portrayal of actual assault, where the protagonist is highly attractive and you experience sexual gratification from the forced sex. This study also actually showed that women who report rape fantasies are actually more likely to have a high self-esteem and be really confident with their sexuality!
Have you ever had a sexual fantasy? Which is the one that arouses you the most? Have you ever acted one out?

Does He Like Me? 10 Signs the Feelings are Mutual

Does He Like Me? 10 Signs the Feelings are Mutual

How much easier were things when we were kids? We weren’t worried about money because money had no meaning to us. Our parents did their best to give us what we needed and boy, didn’t we take that for granted. Summer vacation was something to look for – two months with nothing to do but have fun and be young. If you wanted to know if a boy liked you, you simply had to get your friend to give him a note that read, “Do you like me? Check yes or no.” How innocent and sweet!

The charm of youth. source: Chris Masters)
Things are decidedly more difficult as adults. Trying to decode what the man in your life is telling you can be difficult and it’s easy to misread signals. Things that seem bad aren’t always bad. Things that seem good aren’t always good. Should you continue to pursue him or are you chasing a fantasy? Here are ten signs that the object of your affection is into you like you’re into him.

He notices things your other friends don’t. (source:

10: He notices little things about you.

Perhaps he notices when you do something different with your hair. Perhaps he just notices that you smile a particular way when you find something funny that’s different from the way you smile when you’re just being polite. He might notice the little subtle differences in your mood – when you’re happy instead of just okay or when you’re feeling a little under the weather. If you’re friends don’t notice, but he does – there’s a good chance he’s into you.

He is creative with his compliments. (source: Robert McDonald)

09: He compliments things other people don’t compliment.

Let’s say you have a nice body and people are always complimenting that body. If the object of your affection drops a compliment about your eyes or your hair, you’ll definitely notice. Chances are, he knows you have a nice body but is he trying to find a way to set himself apart from the other guys that offer compliments. Maybe he compliments an idea you have or a certain choice of words. If he compliments your mind, he appreciates who you are inside and not just out.

He makes a real effort to see you. (source: Toshimasa Ishibashi)

08: He goes out of his way to talk to you.

Sure he might stop and chat if he sees you in the grocery store or at a bar, but does he go out of his way to talk to you? Does he call you? Does he visit at work? Anything that requires extra effort on his part to get a little of your time can be considered going out of his way to talk to you. The further out of his way he’ll go, the more into you he likely is. This doesn’t count if he always asks about your best friend or your sister. He might be seeking you out for a whole other reason.

Phone calls ‘just because’. (source: Nerissa's Ring)

07: He calls you on a regular basis just to talk.

There’s plenty of guys out there who’ll call you to hang out. We call those guys friends. If the object of your affection calls you up to just chit chat without any real clear purpose, he likes hearing your voice and he misses having you around enough to call you up. If he’s calling to discuss problems all the time, you’re just a friend, but if he just wants to talk about what you’re up to and what he’s up to without asking anything of you or getting into a phone therapy session, he’s probably into you.

He thinks everyone should treat you like a princess. (source: The Hudson Family)

06: He gets angry or upset with how other people treat you.

If someone is harassing you, threatening you, or beating you around, your friends are going to be upset no matter what. Heck, I don’t know most of you reading this, and I’m upset for you. What you’re looking for here is a guy that gets upset if someone isn’t treating you up to his standards. If he thinks you deserve to be treated like a queen, there’s a pretty good chance your affection is reciprocated.

Little thoughtful gifts for no reason mean he thinks about you. (source: Ken's Oven)

05: He buys you thoughtful little gifts for no reason.

He doesn’t have to lavish you with expensive gifts of gold and diamonds to let his intentions be known. If he’s out somewhere and sees a little something that makes him think of you and he actually picks it up for you and offers it as a random gift, you probably have an admirer. If he does this for all of his friends, he’s probably just a generous kind of guy. Vacation, birthday or Christmas presents don’t count unless it’s something way out of the ordinary that no guy would give a girl he thinks of as ‘just a friend’. Consult your other friends on this one.

Affectionate touching is a good sign. (source: Mike Baird)

04: He touches you in an affectionate but not sexual way.

Don’t take a guy grabbing your caboose as a sign he wants to settle down with you. If he’s grabbing your bum but you’re not sure he’s interested in you in a romantic way, it’s pretty safe to assume he wanted to do something with you, but that likely doesn’t include a wedding ring or anything even close to that. If you’re looking for a fling, then go for it. All the more power to you. If the object of your affection’s content with putting his arm around you, touching your hands and maybe even brushing your hair out of your face, there is a very good chance that he likes you in more than a friendly sort of way.

He wants to look his best when he sees you. (source: Christian Mairitsh)

03: He dresses up to spend time with you.

We’re not talking suits and ties here, ladies – at least not exclusively. More than that though, don’t assume he isn’t into you if he doesn’t dress up. Some guys are just t-shirt and jeans kind of guys. My husband is. He didn’t even wear a suit to our wedding and I love that about him. This more refers to a guy that normally takes a more relaxed approach to their appearance who suddenly seems to be paying a little more attention to it. If he’s brushing his hair when he’s more of a messy hair kinda guy there’s a good chance he’s into you.

He wants to be able to talk to you about what you like talking about. (source: Hugo Chisholm)

02: He takes a special interest in things you’re interested in.

Do you like music? Does the object of your affection suddenly want to know more about music? There’s a good chance he’s into you. If he’s brushing up on the bands you’re interested in (the same can be said for movies, books, sports etc), he wants to have something he can talk to you about. Take this as a definite good sign – especially if he starts recommending things to you. It doesn’t matter if its something you’ve heard of. It’s the thought that counts. He’s trying to find common ground – not something many people will do with people they just consider friends.

He really hears what you’re saying. (source: Simon James)

01: He really listens when you talk, even if you’re not saying much.

If you’re telling a long, rambling story (come on, we’ve all done it. I even make a living doing it) but he is hanging on every word, there is a more than decent chance he’s interested in more than friendship. Listening shows that he’s interested in what you have to say; not just waiting for your turn to talk. How much he listens is a pretty good indication of how interested he is. If your talking about buying toothpaste and he is reacting like it’s the most wildly enthralling story he’s heard since you bought deodorant, he’s definitely into you – way into you.

If you've been reading over this list saying, “He’s done that” and “He does that all the time”, stop worrying about whether or not he likes you. He clearly does. Get the ball rolling. Let him know you like him too. You don’t have to wait for him to make his move. Tell him you’re interested and let things progress from there.

Fulltime income from home

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20 Reasons You Don’t Have a Boyfriend


20 Reasons You Don’t Have a Boyfriend

Manolith, a men’s lifestyle online magazine, recently ran the article 20 Reasons You’re Still Single. I was delighted to learn that there are apparently a significant number of men who want a relationship and need advice. The piece addresses a wide range of typical male weaknesses, including questionable hygiene, douchebaggery and being “too nice.”
One of the premises of Hooking Up Smart is that in general, men are more interested in sexual variety than women, and therefore less interested in committed relationships. Individual preferences fall within a spectrum, but current relationship and cultural dynamics can be said to favor the male. Women need to be smart and strategic if they want to secure and maintain a satisfying relationship.
Many contributing factors have created “hookup culture,” where physical intimacy precedes emotional intimacy, which may or may not develop. While the odds may be against committed relationships, there are some happy couples to be seen around. Even at college, that Happy Hookup Hunting Ground, you see couples walking hand in hand. It happens.
Is it a matter of luck? Right place, right time? Or are there women who have a knack for bringing out the boyfriend in guys? None of us can control luck or timing. We can present our best physical selves by taking care of ourselves and taking pride in our appearance, but we can’t mess (much) with the genetic hand we’ve been dealt. That’s the bad news.
The good news is that we can control our behavior, and that can change everything! I’m not suggesting that you change to get yourself a man. I’m suggesting that there are certain behaviors that men, as well as discriminating women, find unattractive. In fact, there are certain behaviors that actually telegraph that you are not relationship material. Becoming aware of those behaviors, and getting rid of them, can be very powerful in changing the way that you are perceived.

My 20 tough love reasons for why you don’t have a boyfriend:

1. You’re needy. You met him last weekend, he texted a few times, and now you just won’t leave the guy alone. You went from 0 to 60 in a few days. You’re already planning for next weekend. This is probably the #1 behavior that gets girls labeled psycho in the early days.
2. You like players. You say you want a nice guy, but you fall for the same lines again and again. You can’t resist the bad boys, the ones who have dumped on other women. You think that you will be different, that nabbing a player will validate your feminine powers. But the player always wins, because the player always walks.
3. You’re a princess. You want a man who will proclaim to the world that he is whipped as butter. He will worship the very ground you walk on. Trouble is, the only men who will happily inhabit a one-down position in a relationship have no balls. Do you really want a guy who will eagerly go to a bunch of chick flicks with you? Wouldn’t you rather accompany him to Transformers from time to time?
4. You flirt too much. Flirting is an essential skill in any woman’s toolkit. It is meant to indicate to a guy that you are singling him out for special attention because you are attracted to him. If you flirt like crazy with every Y chromosome you encounter, it loses its effectiveness, and makes you seem “not very choosy.” Also, if you are spending time with a guy but can’t stand the idea of hiding your light under a bushel, he is not going to appreciate your flirting with other men. It makes him look and feel less manly, and awakens unwelcome feelings of jealousy.
5. You’re not in the game. If you’re shy, reserved, or aloof, you are not approachable. Many beautiful women are ignored by guys because the odds of rejection are too high. You also telegraph likely rejection if you hold back. If you find a guy attractive, meet him halfway by signaling your interest with eye contact and a smile. If you know him, pay him some attention.
6. You’re too picky. You want a guy who is well-educated, financially successful, handsome, funny, witty, generous, blah blah blah. You want a 10. Get realistic. How about well-educated, funny and generous? Or handsome and witty, but a poet, i.e. broke? Perhaps financially successful, generous and fun to be with, but never went to college? Keep an open mind when you’re sizing up men. Allow yourself to find the good.
7. You’re a Girl Gone Wild. Stop dancing on tabletops when you’re drunk. In fact, stop getting drunk. Drunk is ugly. No one, male or female, ever became more attractive when they got drunk (beer goggles just fool you into thinking they did). When you are drunk, you say and do foolish things. Step away from the beer pong table. If you wouldn’t do it sober…then you really don’t want to do it at all.
8. You’re ditzy. I once knew a very smart woman who exclaimed at a frat party that she thought Mt. Rushmore was a natural phenomenon. I don’t know why some women love to get all girly and giggly. I suppose it makes them feel sexier, a la Marilyn Monroe. If you’re with a guy who wants his women stupid, you need a new guy. Lose the simpering act.
9. You’re a Mean Girl. Seriously, stop being a bitch. I’ve heard guys speak in awe (and fear) of mean girls, but Chuck Bass is the only guy I’ve ever seen who really wanted to love one, and he’s fictitious. Sometimes, guys want to get with mean girls because they’re powerful, but that relationship isn’t about love.
10. You’re high maintenance. You always feel slighted. He’s always saying and doing the wrong thing. Your feelings are constantly hurt, and he is constantly apologizing. Fighting all the time can be rewarding in the short-term, because it amps up the sexual tension for makeup sex, but ultimately it’s a total boner-killer.
11. You’re aggressive. You act like one of the guys. You pursue, make moves, call the shots. You say that you’re a liberated woman, so you can grab whatever cock grabs your fancy. That will get you laid, but try to remember that it’s the male of the species that got the big dose of testosterone. That male is biologically programmed to seek his complementary opposite – which includes a much larger dose of estrogen. You can be strong, independent, and very, very female.
12. You’re self-absorbed. You talk about yourself all the time. You talk about your ex all the time. You cry on his shoulder all the time when you don’t get what you want. You’re not really giving. You’re not emotionally engaged in a caring and generous way. If you’re not curious about him; if you are not hungry for details about who he is and what he’s into, then maybe he’s the wrong guy. Or maybe you’re the wrong girl.
13. You’re a homebody. You’re not out there meeting new people every day. You are not going through each day looking to interact with and smile at attractive and approachable people. And by the way, get off the cell phone. The adorable guy behind you in line at Starbucks can’t say hi if you’re on your phone, plus he’s hearing you sound like a complete idiot with your BFF.
14. You’re too hard to get. Yes, everyone likes a challenge. No one likes eager or desperate. But employing “The Rules” or some other silly tactic is just going to leave you solo. If he asks you out spontaneously for tonight, that’s a real invitation. If you are interested, accept. A guy’s suggesting a plan on the spur of the moment is not him treating you badly. It’s him expressing an interest in spending time with you. (Obviously, do the opposite of what I say here if it’s a booty call situation.)
15. Your number is too high. OK, fine, you don’t want any guy who cares about how many people you’ve slept with. Problem is….that’s most guys. You don’t have to tell anyone your personal data. Just be aware that when you’re making the rounds within a certain community or group of friends, word gets out fast. I don’t think there has ever, ever been a guy who got laid and didn’t tell anyone about it afterwards. If your number is high and that fact is well known, you have every right to find a new pack of males and revirginate reinvent yourself.
16. You’re flaky. A plan is a commitment. Don’t blow someone off when something better comes along. Don’t ditch him because your friend “really needs you.” Don’t double book yourself. Don’t be late. Don’t get drunk and not show. Women constantly complain that men aren’t reliable, but I’ve seen plenty of women flake out on guys.
17. You’re materialistic. You know what? The best dates are cheap dates. In fact, I think the best dates I ever had were actually free dates. Cooking together. Hanging out. Taking a long walk. I met my husband in graduate school, and he was dead broke. He was paying his own way and had very little money. We’d only been together a month or so when my birthday rolled around. He gave me very inexpensive fun earrings, but what I remember is the card he made. All it said on it was: Head Over Heels. That was the best birthday gift ever.
18. You’re scared. You’ve been burned before. You are understandably wary. This leads you to be withholding. He puts it out there, lays it on the line, and you just can’t reciprocate. You really like him, but you just don’t want to get hurt again. This means he knows up front that he will be the one to get hurt. No guy will stick around to watch that happen. You’ve got to find a way forward. There is no love for any of us without considerable risk, so do what you need to do to work through it.
19. You’re rigid. You have plans for Saturday night, but his buddies are going to a game that night, would Friday be OK? You say, “No, you made plans with me first. And Saturday is date night.” He picks you up and mentions that one of his friends and his gf will be joining the two of you for dinner, if that’s OK. It’s not. You’re miffed that you two won’t be having a night alone. He wants to go to the party, you don’t. You grudgingly agree to go and stay for an hour. After an hour, you want to leave, he’s having a great time. You let him know that an hour’s up and it’s time to leave RIGHT NOW. Being rigid is largely about asserting control. That’s never a winning relationship tactic.
20. You’re a pushover. You put up with all kinds of crap. You allow yourself to be booty called and stood up. You allow him to tease you in a not-affectionate way (comments about your weight come to mind). You allow him to pick fights, and then forgive him for flirting or hooking up with another girl in the two hours you were broken up. If you do not respect yourself, he certainly isn’t going to respect you, and your value in his eyes will tank.
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Friday 28 June 2013

How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - Do's And Don'ts To Get A Girlfriend.....


How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - Do's And Don'ts To Get A Girlfriend.....

How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - Step By Step Guide

Finding it hard to Get A Girlfriend? You're not alone. Many guys have this problem and are asking themselves "why can't I get a girlfriend?" Some lucky guys attract girls easily, while others can't get a girlfriend no matter how hard they try. Why do these guys find it so easy to attract girls? There are many reasons why getting a girlfriend could be proving difficult for you - approaching girls the wrong way, giving a girl the impression of being desperate, your appearance, how you talk to a girl etc.... The good news is, you can improve on all of these things. This guide, will talk you through some of the things you should be doing (or not doing) when it comes to approaching and talking to girls. Follow these basic rules and hopefully you will be in a better place to go out and get a girlfriend of your own.

How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - Take Pride In Your Appearance!

Step 1

OK, first off - Regardless of how charming, witty and handsome you are, you won't get a girlfriend if you smell or don't keep yourself clean. So hygiene should be something that is well taken care of before you even get to the stage of approaching a girl. The better you look, the more confident and more relaxed you will be. So make sure that personal grooming is high on your agenda. Showering or bathing regularly with some men's toiletries will keep you feeling fresh and smelling gorgeous. Make sure that you brush your teeth and if necessary use a mouthwash to eliminate any bad breath. It's always handy to keep a breath freshener spray or some mints in your pocket, just in case. Many guys have a certain style that makes them look grungy or shabby but regardless of the style you want to portray, make sure your clothes are clean and fresh. If you feel you are overweight or could do with some toning up, it wouldn't hurt to join a gym. Apart from the health benefits, you may just find yourself a girlfriend in process!

How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - Don't Be Desperate - Be Yourself!

Step 2

Sometimes the pressure of not being able to get a girlfriend becomes overwhelming. The question of "how can I get a girlfriend" takes priority over everything else and before we know it, desperation is setting in. This is the last thing you want, as there is nothing more off putting to a girl than a desperate guy. Girls don't want a guy who 'tries' too hard or smothers them with requests to do things for them, especially when you've only just met. You see, girls need to be able to relax around you, feel comfortable, laugh, giggle and be themselves. How can they possibly be themselves when you are not being yourself? So the first thing to do, is take the pressure off yourself. Stop focussing on "HOW" to get a girlfriend and think more about YOU, Think about what you enjoy and what activities or hobbies you would like to share with a new girlfriend. What sort of conversations do YOU like to have? What sort of things do YOU know a lot about? What would YOU like to know more about? These are the sorts of things that will come up in conversation and will quickly determine not only if the girl thinks you're right for her.... but whether or not that girl is right for you! Once you are comfortable with yourself, you are more likely to make a girl feel comfortable around you, increasing your chances of getting a girlfriend.

How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - The Approach - Pick Your Moments Wisely!

Step 3

Approaching a girl may sound easier said than done depending on who the girl in question is or where you are. What I mean is, if you see the same girl each day at the bus stop, then striking up a conversation is going to be far easier than say, in a club, with loud music and strobe lights. So depending on the environment you find yourself in, will depend on the approach that you use. You don't want to approach her if she is deep in conversation with someone else, is trying to concentrate on something or seems stressed. Try to find a time when she appears relaxed and you can easily gain her attention. In a club setting, asking to dance is a great way of introduction, eye contact and flirting may seem easier in this environment than any other. However, a club is probably where you will get her phone number or set a 'date' for another time. If you are approaching say "the girl at the bus stop" you will want to start a conversation and this can often seem scarier than the nightclub setting. Try to talk about something that she will find interesting.... for example, she may be holding a book, gadget, have a dog etc. Asking a question is a great way to get someone to engage with you. Be sure to use a question that won't warrant a one word answer. You might say "excuse me, is that the new iphone you have there? How are you finding it?".... "Or what a cute dog, what breed is it?"...Or even simpler "what do you think about this weather we're having eh?" There are many different questions to ask to begin a conversation - maintaining the conversation can be a bit trickier. Introduce yourself as an afterthought, like "oh sorry ... by the way I'm Martin!" If you feel confident you can offer a handshake. Hopefully she will respond by introducing herself to you. Whichever way the conversation goes, you should remain interested at all times, nod your head appropriately, keep eye contact and don't be afraid to say you've never heard of something, or to ask for clarification. People often love to talk about themselves or something they know a lot about and if you're nervous, then the more she talks, the less you have to. If things go well through the introductory stage, you may feel confident enough to ask her out or at least exchange phone numbers, so you can ask her out later. At this stage, you may not want it to appear like a "date" even if that is exactly what it will be. So its best to suggest something like, "do you want to grab a coffee?" or " Are you doing anything on Saturday? I'd love to talk some more - say lunch?" Whatever you suggest, make it casual at first, you don't want to scare her off with an intimate dinner for two at a fancy restaurant when she doesn't even know you yet. Suggest somewhere that you can both get to know each other and chat some more in a relaxed environment.

How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - The Date, Make Or Break Time!

Step 4

Assuming that you have succeeded in asking her out "casually" and she has accepted, then this 'first date' is usually the make or break as to whether she will become your girlfriend. Everything we have discussed up until now will be coming together in a much more intense way so make sure the first 3 steps are taken care of.

Step 1 - Hygiene and Appearance are impeccable
Step 2 - You are relaxed and willing to be yourself
Step 3 - You are prepared for conversation

When she arrives or you meet up, make sure you compliment her on either how she looks, how she's styled her hair or even her clothing "that dress looks lovely on you". Don't however, overdo it and compliment her on a list of things as that will appear rather creepy and you're heading back to desperate town. Just a casual compliment when you first meet is a great start to the date. Don't overdo the mannerly stuff either, ie. don't be clambering to take her coat, get her chair, take her bag etc all at once. Relax, use your manners but in a casual relaxed way, little things like gesturing for her to go first or holding the door are fine. If you realise you have been less than thoughtful, don't be afraid to say so e.g. "sorry, I should have got that for you" or " sheesh where are my manners?" Again, don't overdo it and be apologising every 2 mins, that's the road to desperation and we're avoiding that like the plague!

Make the effort to get to know her, ask her about herself, her job, her hobbies and interests. Remain focussed and interested at all times and make sure she knows you're not bored by saying things like "really, how does that work?" or "I've never heard of that ... what's involved?" Be prepared to talk about yourself, she's bound to be asking questions too so the key to this is HONESTY! Remember Step 2 and don't be afraid to be yourself. Don't try to impress her by lying, you'll be found out and its not a good grounding for a relationship. Telling her you have a high flying job or a flash car may even have the opposite effect (unless it's true of course) and scare her off so its best to stick to being you. Tell her about your hobbies and interests, they don't have to coincide with hers in fact it can often go in your favour if you're into something she's never entertained before. Its a great excuse to ask her out again perhaps on a date to introduce her to one of your hobbies and show her how you spend your time. Likewise you can suggest she introduces you to something she likes to do that you haven't tried before. It could be something simple like a trip to the museum, ten pin bowling, motorcycles, hill walking.... the list is endless. Don't be afraid to take the conversation in another direction if you stumble on a subject that isn't her cup of tea or worse still upsets her. Make light of it, change the subject and remember that humour is a great tonic in any situation. Hopefully by the end of this date, you will know whether or not there is any chemistry between you. Having spent some time together you should feel comfortable enough to either set another date or if things haven't gone very well, just agree to get in touch and leave it at that. If its gone really well, you may feel brave enough to kiss her goodbye and if she responds, then that's a great sign that a relationship is in the making and you just might have yourself a girlfriend!

How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - Impress Her And Be Romantic!

Step 5

Assuming all went well on your first meet up contrary to what you might think, there is probably even more pressure on date number two. The second date does not necessarily mean she's in love with you, it means she wants to get to know you better or hasn't quite made up her mind about you. Therefore your second date should be exciting! This is your chance to show her how charming and romantic you can be. Perhaps you could greet her with a small bunch of flowers (unless you think that's too cheesy for you). Many girls like to feel that little bit special so make an effort in some way. Even if you buy her a book you thought she might like or the CD of a group you discussed during your first date. Show her you have a thoughtful side and have gone out of your way to impress her. Take her somewhere interesting and new that you think she may enjoy but make sure that afterwards, you take her somewhere romantic for dinner and drinks. She may insist on going dutch but if you can afford it, its nice to offer to pay on the first "romantic" date, if she objects, you can always suggest she pays next time. This also leaves the assumption that there WILL be another date which is always good. Again, as before, make sure to compliment her and try to encourage intimacy by touching her hand or taking her arm. Hopefully you'll both have so much fun together that you'll be arranging your next date half way through this one!

How Can I Get A Girlfriend? - Rinse and Repeat

If At First You Don't Succeed..........

Don't lose heart if things don't go according to plan first time around. The best advice is to make sure you are occupying your time doing the things you like to do and if the opportunity arises to strike up a conversation or approach a girl that takes your interest, do so. The more practice you get, the better you will become. Just don't keep focussing on "how can I get girlfriend", you'll only remind yourself you don't have one and bring yourself down. Instead, try to have fun, keep yourself occupied and be sociable, there is much more chance of finding a girlfriend if you're out and about. If you need more detailed advice on approaching girls, tips on secret body language or to learn how girls are constantly "testing" guys check out How Can I Get A Girfriend for info on how to pass these tests.