Digital Life: How to Win at Online Dating

I'm in my 30s, have a job and my own apartment, and now I'm looking for a long-term relationship — or at least real dates instead of hookups. I've joined a number of online dating sites, but it seems like mission impossible. What can I do to better my odds?

— Name withheld

Here's the good news: Almost 40% of singles who are "looking" have used an online dating service and a nearly a quarter of that group have met a spouse or long-term partner that way, concluded a recent Pew study. To maximize your odds, start by making sure you're on the right site for what you're seeking. For instance, OkCupid promises to "use math to get you dates. It's extremely accurate, as long as (a) you're honest, and (b) you know what you want." Then, there's Tinder, a relatively new app that matches people geographically, based entirely on their looks, with no background information. I think we all know what that means.

Next, follow these rules:

1. Be smart about your screen name. Choose a handle that says something genuine both about you and what you're seeking. Avoid names like "SexyGuy" or "HotBabe," which seem more about hooking up than getting to know someone. Use a handle that reveals something intriguing about you, like, "DCGymnast" or "FoodieInThe312." (These last two also let others know where you live – another plus).

2. Spend time on your profile. This is not a time to be lazy -- so don't just slap something together quickly. Be sure to answer all questions honestly and fill in the blanks about you and the kind of person you're seeking. Then read it back as if you were the potential date. Ask a friend to take a second look for you.

How to get your dating adventure started this Christmas

3. Your photo matters. University brainiacs at MIT and the University of Chicago reported that women and men who post profile photos receive twice as many e-mails as those without photos. That means, make sure your face is visible and that you're smiling. Since you're looking for a romance, choose photos of yourself in casual or work dress – with your clothes on! Please, no cheating: your picture should show you within two to three years of your current age.

4: Be clear about your expectations. Don't waste time -- yours or someone else's – so say what you mean and mean what you say. (Do you really like moonlit walks on the beach, or are you more likely to be found in a bar at midnight?) Make sure you're on the same page as your new prospect.

5. Be smart. Don't give out your last name, address, or personal e-mail right away. When you're ready, start with your cell number. Don't agree to a get together until you're comfortable — and when you do, meet in a coffeehouse or some other public place. Oh, and here's one last bit of advice: First impressions really matter. According to Match.com, most guys decide within the first 15 minutes whether they'll ask for a second date. Women take about an hour. Good luck.

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3 Little-known Tricks to Achieve Success with Online Dating

Twenty years ago, the concept of online dating was a brand new idea. During the early years of its inception, the majority of Internet users would hesitate to plunge into the online dating pool due to fear, uncertainty, and social stigma. But, internet dating has come a long way two decades after. Today, due to the large use of social networks like Facebook and online dating sites such as Fish2Fish and Match.com, the stigma associated with online dating has nearly died down. More people are now more accepting of modern-age dating and more are completely prepared to dive into the pool of online dating despite its unpredictability. Joining an online dating site, without a doubt, has truly become a trend.

For those who are having second thoughts about joining an online dating site, the figures should speak for themselves. If you will base the reliability of internet dating on statistics, you’ll find that success stories are abundant and that a good number of online interactions (around 33 percent) led to actual dates. Roughly 20 percent of internet users met their current partner online while an estimated 17 percent of those who dated ended up marrying each other. These numbers are not bad at all, especially given all the horror stories that one hears from those who were able to try cyber dating.

If you want to spice up your ever so boring lovelife, there are many ways to do it. But, in this digital age, you should consider testing the online dating waters to increase your chances at finding the right one. Worry not, because there are over 40 million others who will be swimming with you once you decide to take the plunge. If you’re new to the online dating scene, here are some little-known tricks that should get you headed to your one true love.

First, remember that in real life, people are more likely to notice you and talk to you if you’re with a dog than if you’re just by yourself. Some recent studies have revealed that around 58 percent of males say that having a dog is like having a babe magnet in the park. On the other hand, approximately 46 percent of women say that they would stop and talk to a man holding a cute puppy. If you wish to improve your odds of finding love online, why not leverage your profile by posting some pictures of you and your dog? Man’s best friend has been proven to draw attention, so take advantage of that.

Just as your cute puppy can draw attention, so is your profile header. Most online dating sites require that you provide a short status/header message that shows up beside or under your username when seekers do searches. Since some people couldn’t come up with something creative, they end up with generic headers like, “I am your soul mate” or “Miss Perfect”. It’s extremely vital that you utilize this space to create a really compelling profile header message – something witty, funny, or interesting that will make seekers want to click on your profile and actually read it.

That picture of you and your dog is undeniably cute, but that doesn’t mean that your profile should stay frozen with that photo for six months. What many online users are not aware of is that one photo, no matter how gorgeous, can only do so much in attracting potential mates. That’s because people are interested in different looks. So, if your primary photo makes you look like a really bubbly person, consider replacing it with one that shows a different side of your personality, like your more mysterious facet. Or, even simpler, simply swap your images. Make your secondary photo your primary photo and change it every now and then for a more appealing profile. If you just switch the order of your photos, you’ll get an entirely different result.

As a firm believer of fate and destiny, what can you actually do to find that one person in the sea of million daters? Simple! Just join an online dating site, create a beautiful profile, post a picture of you and your dog, make a creative profile header, and change your profile picture once in a while. Before you know it, you’re already getting a slew of online seekers who are interested to ask you out on a date.

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